


Expectations

by magical-illusion13 (coldnightairinmylungs)



Series: Secrets - Promises - Expectations [3]
Category: Kaylor - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe - Magical Realism, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-08
Updated: 2019-03-06
Packaged: 2019-09-14 07:52:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 31,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16909092
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/coldnightairinmylungs/pseuds/magical-illusion13
Summary: While Taylor is making plans to take big steps forward in her life, Karlie is unsure what she wants in hers. All she knows is that she wants Taylor in it. When that is not enough, the two need to find a way to stay on the same page …





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> hey guys! I'm back with part 3! Hope you enjoy! I would love to receive feedback, comments and kudos :)

“Good morning, Taylor” Karlie said cheerfully as she walked into the bedroom, balancing a breakfast tray.

She put the tray down on her side of the bed and smiled when she saw that Taylor had hogged the blanket completely on her own side. It was a quite familiar scene. One that she knew she could see every morning if she wanted to.

 “Taylor” she repeated and nudged the singer’s shoulder to wake her up.

“I got cinnamon rolls from the bakery.”

That did the trick, and Taylor turned around.

“Oh, good morning” she said sleepily.

“You’re already up.”

“It’s 9 am, Taylor” Karlie giggled. “And it’s our last day here. I want to go for a little hike before we have to spend all our afternoon in the car.”

“Okay, okay, I’m up” Taylor mumbled and sat up.

“The coffee smells amazing.”

Karlie leaned over for a good morning kiss, and Taylor happily provided it.

She scooted over a little, making room for Karlie. The taller girl sat down on the bed next to her and laughed as Taylor pulled the blanket back around her body.

“I’m cold okay” the singer mumbled and pouted.

“See, that’s why a hike is perfect to warm you up today” Karlie said and cuddled close to Taylor as best as she could without spilling her coffee.

They ate in silence for a while. The only sounds were the slight breeze going through the leaves outside and that of a bird hopping up and down on the roof. The wooden cabin was a few hundred yards away from the others, allowing privacy. It stood between tall trees and next to a bed of bright blue and purple blooming autumn daisies.

The couple had been enjoying their time away from the rest of the world, like other anniversaries spent here. Over the past four years, Big Sur had come to take on an important meaning between the two of them.

“Man, these cinnamon rolls are so good” Taylor said with her mouth full. “Why didn’t you get them for the last three days?”

Karlie grinned sheepishly. The best part of waking up first on holidays was getting to decide on the breakfast.

“Just wanted a special treat for our last day.”

Taylor simply hummed in response.

Karlie wanted to add something but decided against it. The morning was too peaceful for her to whine about having to go back to NYC alone and go back to her job and apartment. She took another bite of her cinnamon roll. Her negative thoughts didn’t belong here. She would have plenty of room for them in the next days.

They finished their breakfast. While Karlie was waiting for Taylor to get ready, she packed her bag, washed the dishes and prepared a little snack for their hike.

“We need to check out by 11, better put our bags and the rest of the groceries into the car now” she said to Taylor who was entering the kitchen.

“God, you’re beautiful” Karlie blurted out when she finally turned around to look at Taylor.

Taylor’s hair was still damp from the shower and her natural curls were showing. She wasn’t wearing any make-up except for a little bit of mascara.

They locked eyes and blushed. They still had that effect on each other. Karlie didn’t know what to do with herself for a moment. The next moment, she couldn’t help but take a step towards Taylor and embrace her in a hug. She smelled sweet of shampoo. Taylor hugged her back just as tightly.

They separated after a while, and Karlie smiled sweetly at Taylor, her eyes roaming over her face, taking in her features. Taylor, on the other hand, had other plans in mind. She took Karlie’s face in her hands, holding it in place, and started kissing her hard. Karlie stumbled backwards in surprise, but caught herself quickly, holding on to Taylor’s waist. The sudden movement brought them closer together, causing Taylor to sigh at the contact. Karlie kissed her back just as urgently.

After a while they broke apart to breathe. Karlie took the opportunity to gently pull down Taylor’s shirt at her collarbone to examine the mark she had left there the night before. She smirked when she saw it was a dark blue, causing Taylor to blush again.

“Shut up” Taylor mumbled and shoved Karlie’s hand away playfully. They leaned in again, and Karlie let herself get lost in the kiss.

The past few days with Taylor had been perfect. They had gone hiking, taken long walks on the beautiful beach, and eaten good food. Every second spent together was worth more than either of them was able to put in words. Especially because after today, they wouldn’t see each other for at least two weeks. Karlie pushed those thoughts to the back of her mind again and instead pulled Taylor in even closer.

After a while, Taylor broke the kiss again and trailed her thumb along Karlie’s jawline.

“Alright, let’s pack up and go” she said quietly, then gave Karlie another quick peck on the lips and let go of her. Karlie stood there for a second longer, mourning the loss of contact.

They finished packing up and carried their bags towards the car. After Taylor had dropped off the keys at the reception and thanked the staff, they took off for the last hike of their stay.

Both were wearing comfortable clothes and a small backpack. The hiking trail started behind the last cabin on the campground.

“Let’s go to the waterfall?” Karlie suggested when the campground was out of sight.

There had not been many people on the campground to begin with at this time of the year, and now they were completely alone, with only the birds chirping in the trees.

“Yeah, sure” Taylor agreed.

“The one look-out is close by too, right?” she asked.

“Yeah, I think so. Let’s check the map later. You brought it, right?” Karlie replied and laughed.

“Yeah, I think I did.”

Taylor seemed to try to remember something, then suddenly stopped dead in her tracks.

“What’s wrong?” Karlie asked concerned, almost bumping into her.

“I forgot the extra film for my polaroid camera in the car.”

“You brought your polaroid camera on a hike?”

“Come on, it’s not like we’re going rock-climbing” Taylor replied drily.

Karlie simply nodded in agreement, knowing better than to argue about the impracticability of bringing the item along when they might as well use their phone cameras.

Taylor kept walking, mumbling something to herself. Karlie simply followed her, not knowing what else to do or say. Taylor stopped again at a park bench some hundred yards further down the trail. She sat down and opened her backpack.

“What, snack time already?” Karlie teased.

“No, dummy. I’m getting the film for the polaroid camera.”

“I thought you left it in the car.”

Taylor in turn looked at Karlie and rolled her eyes.

“I’m a conjurer, remember?”

“Oh!” Karlie said in understanding, leaning her head back. She sat down next to Taylor.

“Yeah, ok, good idea. Do you need me to look the other way again?” she kept teasing.

Taylor raised her chin. “No, I’m good. I’ve been practicing.”

“Alright! Let’s see what you got!”

Taylor put the Polaroid camera next to herself on the bench. She then put her hands into her lap, palms facing upwards. She intently stared at them for a few moments and mumbled something.

Karlie watched her, an amused expression on her face. She had seen Taylor’s attempts at conjuring up items go wrong many times. She remembered half empty packages of almond milk and baking soda, and most recently – and her personal favorite – a pair of glasses instead of a drinking glass Taylor had wanted to replace. She had been in a hurry, before her mum would notice she had dropped and broken one. But she was practicing, Taylor always assured her. It had become an inside joke between their families. Karlie’s younger twin sisters, who were more well-trained in their conjuring skills than Taylor, were always teasing the singer, too.

Karlie was pulled out of her thoughts when Taylor let out a squeal.

“Look Karlie, it worked!”

She quickly opened the small package. Her eyes started shining. “It’s ten sheets too, not half-empty!”

“That’s great!” Karlie said, genuinely excited for Taylor.

The singer turned the package around in her hands.

“Hmm, something is … oh! It’s not name-brand!” she said disappointed. “Oh well, this will do, too.”

“You did great!” Karlie said, wanting to reassure her.

“As long as it’s functional. Ten sheets of film should be enough, right?”

“Yeah” Taylor replied, smiling now.

“Do you have a headache?” Karlie asked. She knew that even using her skills a little always caused Taylor to feel unwell and used a lot of energy.

“No, it’s okay. That’s one thing that did get better with practice” Taylor said. “It did take a bit longer than usual though, the appearance of the thing, I mean” she added with furrowed brows.

Karlie stood up from the bench. “Maybe the bad reception here in the woods” she joked.

Taylor snort-laughed in response.

“Come one, let’s go!” the taller girl added and reached out her hand to pull Taylor up, too.

They kept walking. They listened to the birds and the sounds of the forest, only talking every once in a while.

After about an hour or so, they arrived at the small waterfall. At the end of the trail there was a lookout with a wooden picknick table. They found it occupied, with a family with two small children sitting there. They seemed to be packing up, however.

“Let’s wait here” Taylor suggested quietly, squeezing Karlie’s hand.

Karlie didn’t need further explanation to understand. Even in a remote place like this, people would always recognize Taylor. The singer appreciated her fans, but this vacation had been all about privacy and getting away from people.

Karlie squeezed Taylor’s hand in response and smiled at her. Taylor had become an increasingly private person during the year. Being in control of what the world could see and know about her had become more important than ever, and she was extremely protective of their relationship in particular. Karlie was grateful for it.

They let go of each other’s hands and non-chalantly walked the trail next to the river up and down. The family left after a few minutes. They walked by the couple without taking notice of Taylor’s presence. When they were gone, Taylor sighed a sigh of relief.

“It’s okay” Karlie whispered and took Taylor’s hand again.

Taylor simply hummed in response and let herself be led to the picknick table. They sat down on opposite sides and unpacked their snacks and water bottles. Taylor put on a long-sleeved shirt, finding the air chilly in the shadows. She then unpacked her polaroid camera and put in the newly conjured up film. Karlie flashed her wide signature smile when the camera was pointed at her. Taylor snapped a picture.

The camera whirred and spit out the photo, and Taylor gently shook it to dry. When she looked at it, an astonished “oh” escaped her lips. She looked from the picture to Karlie. The taller girl was still sitting there in a similar manner, staring intently at Taylor. She felt her pulse quicken.

“What is it?” Karlie asked and leaned forward.

“Nothing” Taylor murmured, not meeting Karlie’s eyes.

“You’re just beautiful.”

She couldn’t tear her eyes away from the photo, in awe of the moment she had captured. Had she been looking up, she would have seen Karlie blush furiously – and for the second time that day.

“Thank you” Karlie mumbled, feeling shy. She turned her sandwich around in her hands, looking down on it as if it was an exotic culinary.

They both looked up at the same time and their eyes met. Taylor smiled softly, and Karlie smiled back at her. Taylor let herself drown in Karlie’s ocean blue eyes, never wanting to come up again. Karlie stopped fiddling around and sat completely still once more, not daring to move and ruin the moment.

Suddenly, Taylor blurted out “I wanted to talk to you about something.”

Just like that, the moment was over. Karlie shifted her weight, not knowing how to reply. _Great timing,_ Taylor internally scolded herself. _Great way to ease into this conversation. Great._

She put the polaroid down on the wooden table and ran a hand through her hair. _Great_. An uncomfortable silence had cast itself over them. Somewhere in the forest Taylor could hear a woodpecker. She cleared her throat.

“Sorry, that came out weirdly”, she chuckled.

Karlie regained her composure and between being worried and finding Taylor’s awkwardness adorable, she asked “What’s wrong?”

She hoped the question had conveyed her concern and not made the situation more uncomfortable. Taylor’s eyes briefly scanned the photo in front of her, then she looked up at Karlie again.

She took a deep breath.

“I want to come out.”

 


	2. Two

“I want to come out.”

Karlie tilted her head a little to the side, staring intently at her girlfriend.

“To whom?”

Taylor swallowed.

“The public.”

Karlie’s eyes went wide.

“Oh.”

She shifted her weight again, but didn’t dare look away from Taylor, whose eyes seemed to be begging her to say more.

“Are you sure?”

She instantly regretted the question.

Taylor tilted her head back and let out a deep sigh.

“Yes, Karlie. That’s why I’m telling you this. I know we haven’t talked about it in a while, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t been thinking about it. I-“

She needed a second to breathe in, and Karlie took the opportunity to halt the rant that was in the making.

“I’m sorry, Tay. I didn’t mean it like that. I’m just surprised.”

She looked at Taylor.

“I will support you no matter what” she added softly, wanting to dissolve the tension.

She reached out her hand over the table, and Taylor took it.

“I know, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to get angry. It’s just that this has been in my head all morning and I wanted to tell you now in person …” she trailed off.

“I understand” Karlie replied and squeezed Taylor’s hand. So they had both had things on their minds that morning that they hadn’t talked about right away.

“So, do you have a specific plan in mind?”

Taylor grinned. “Yes, actually.”

 _Stupid question,_ Karlie thought. _Of course she does. What part of Taylor’s career and public image isn’t carefully planned._

“Well, you know my contract with my label runs out anyways, so I won’t have that problem anymore a year from now. But when this album comes out, I already want to become a bit bolder, giving more hints and stuff” Taylor explained with a mischievous grin.

“Like what?”

“Oh, you know, lots of rainbows and stuff.”

Karlie raised an eyebrow, but couldn’t help grinning, too.

“Besides, the lyrics kinda speak for themselves” Taylor added.

Karlie blushed. She knew that this would be an album all about her. And yet, she hadn’t heard any of the songs yet.

“I would like to confirm that” she said playfully, “but _someone_ is holding back the songs from me. Do I get to hear them soon or do I need to buy the album for myself?”

Taylor stuck out her tongue. “Just wait.”

“I hate waiting” Karlie whined. “At least tell me what the songs are about?”

“You, obviously.”

“Yeah, and more specifically?”

“Oh my god, Karlie, just wait until I show them to you!” Taylor laughed.

“I’m nervous about this, too, you know. And it only comes out it a month. Plenty of time” she added.

“At least tell me the title?” Karlie begged.

“Reputation.”

“What?”

“That’s the title. Reputation.”

“Oh.” Karlie looked up at the tree tops. “Wow. That sounds ominous” she laughed.

“Okay, back to what I was actually going to talk about” Taylor tried to steer the conversation back, “I also want to do like a listening party with fans.”

Karlie looked back at Taylor.

“At my house.”

The taller girl stopped short.

“Oh. Wow. What?”

“Yeah” Taylor said. “I’ve been wanting to do something like that for a while. You know how I always interact with fans online, and I want to invite some of them and to like a small party at my house.”

Karlie exhaled audibly.

“Sounds like a big thing. Before or after the album comes out?”

“After, before wouldn’t be enough time to plan.” Taylor explained. “I’m not sure where I want to do it, or maybe I’ll have multiple dates” she shrugged. “But I want it to be like a coming out party. Both for me and the album” she grinned.

Karlie laughed.

“Am I invited?”

Taylor rolled her eyes in fake-annoyance. Then she squeezed Karlie’s hand, becoming serious again, before letting go of it to run her hand through her hair.

“Obviously. In fact, I want you to be there as my girlfriend” she said carefully.

“Oh.”

Taylor’s heart started beating out of her chest. “Are you not okay with that?”

Karlie didn’t reply right away, thinking about the question.

“I don’t know, to be honest.”

She fiddled with her hands in her lap.

“Am I being introduced as your girlfriend to only your invited fans, or like, the entire world?”

Taylor let out the breath she had been holding.

“Karlie. Whatever is comfortable for you.”

She got up and went around the table to sit next to Karlie. Karlie turned around to face her and take Taylor’s hands in hers.

Taylor spoke next.

“Yes, I wanted to introduce you to my fans as my girlfriend. They would obviously have to keep it a secret. Ironic, I know, but that’s my entire career, I guess” she said drily. “But I want to keep being careful in public. We’ve become pretty good at that, don’t you think?”

Karlie simply hummed in response.

“I don’t want to do too much at once” Taylor continued. “But if you’d rather not be introduced at the listening party, then I respect that, of course. We will find a way.”

Taylor scooted even closer to Karlie, their knees now touching. Karlie, deep in thought, was rubbing circles onto the back of Taylor’s hand with her thumb.

“I’ll think about it” she said quietly after a while.

“Okay” Taylor replied just as quietly.

Karlie let go of her hand and opened her arms instead, and Taylor let herself be wrapped up in them. The warmth of Karlie’s body and the gentleness with which she held her instantly relaxed Taylor. She closed her eyes. Karlie smelled sweet and refreshing, like pine – or maybe it was the forest surrounding them.

Karlie gave Taylor a soft kiss on her hair.

“We’ll figure it out” she whispered.

Taylor simply hummed against Karlie’s jacket in response. They stayed like that for a while, enjoying each other’s presence and the quiet of the forest. The splashing of the waterfall accompanied their streams of thoughts.

Taylor mumbled something against Karlie’s chest, causing the taller girl to laugh.

“What?”

“I was just saying” Taylor started and separated a little from Karlie, “I wanted to call Tree and tell her about my plans as soon as I get home. She needs to know first.”

“Yeah, makes sense.” Karlie replied.

“What do you think she’s gonna say?”

Taylor sighed. “I don’t know.”

She readjusted to look up at Karlie.

“She’s been asking me about PR relationships again recently, even though I keep telling her I don’t want to do that anymore.” She bit the inside of her cheek. “She’s not homophobic or anything, she just takes her job very seriously, and doesn’t want me to get any bad press again.”

“Yeah, I know” Karlie nodded. “I have to say I’m kinda glad I haven’t seen her in person in such a long time” she laughed. “It means things are going well.”

Taylor chuckled.

“If there is a proper coming out or anything, you’ll see her a lot probably.”

Karlie said nothing, but Taylor could feel her tensing up.

“That is, if we decide to include you in my coming out” she added quickly.

Karlie told herself to let it go.

“Yeah” she simply replied.

Taylor dropped her shoulders and absentmindedly looked towards the waterfall, then the table. She realized they hadn’t eaten yet. As if on cue, her stomach growled.

Karlie laughed, and the tension between them was gone again.

“Let’s eat and then continue walking.”

They separated, and Taylor reached over the table for her lunchbox, wanting to keep sitting next to Karlie. They ate and talked.

Before they left, Taylor took a polaroid of the waterfall. They enjoyed the rest of their hike and their time together before the long car ride back to LA.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading! The updates on this story will be less frequent than my previous ones, maybe once a week.
> 
> You can also find this series on Wattpad with the added bonus of covers and more ways to comment :) the username is the same as here.


	3. Three

The car was driving along the road near the coast. There was not much traffic, and the view was clear. The sun had already passed its zenith, despite it only being the early afternoon. The two women in the car were enjoying the scenery. The endlessness of the Pacific Ocean, the rock formations and the wildflowers on the side of the road. They had turned the windows down to allow a fresh breeze in.

“Taylorrrr!” Karlie whined and turned down the music.

“What?”

Taylor looked at Karlie, but quickly glanced back on the road, not wanting to lose focus while driving.

“Please don’t tell me you’re hungry already.”

Karlie chuckled in response.

“No.”

Taylor looked over at her again and rolled her eyes. She gave her a questioning look.

“You promised to show me the album!”

Taylor sighed.

“I did. And guess what, I was gonna show it to you on this car ride, but I was waiting for a good opportunity” she said drily.

“So thanks for being whiny and unromantic.”

She playfully stuck out her tongue at Karlie, who did the same in response.

“Well, since I ruined your big reveal, the timing is perfect now” Karlie grinned.

“Is the music on your phone?”

She made a movement to grab Taylor’s phone from the tray between them, but Taylor quickly jerked her arm away.

“Karlie!”

“Ok ok, I was just kidding … but is it?”

Taylor groaned in response.

“Yes, it is. How long have you known me?”

Karlie grinned, looking proud of herself.

“Long enough to know you have your own music on your phone” she said and winked.

Taylor didn’t know what to say to that, so another eye-roll had to do.

She looked back on the road. They had approached a car in front of them that was going way under the speed limit, so she overtook it. The car became smaller in the rearview mirror. Taylor checked her speed. No, she was good. She gripped the steering wheel, palms sweaty. The road in front was all clear. The scenery passed by, but by now her mind was occupied otherwise.

So this was the moment she would show Karlie her new album.

“Taylor?”

“Hm?”

“Are you okay? You seem nervous.”

“Yeah, I’m good.” Taylor took one hand off the steering wheel to wipe her sweaty palm on her jeans.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to overwhelm you. I just really want to hear it. And … and you know, we’re not gonna spend that much time together when we get back …” Karlie trailed off.

Taylor could hear the sadness in her voice.

“No, it’s alright. I wanted to show you the album anyways, remember? I’ve procrastinated this for too long, anyways. I want you to hear the album first.”

Taylor cleared her throat.

“But yeah, I’m a bit nervous, I guess. I want you to like it.”

She looked over to Karlie again. The taller girl was biting her lip, looking just as nervous as she felt.

Karlie reached out her hand, and Taylor took it and squeezed it. The road ahead of them was clear, no need to worry. Taylor nevertheless slowed down the speed.

“I will like it, Tay. I love all your music.”

Karlie squeezed her hand back.

“Especially when it’s about me” she winked.

“Now show me the album.”

“Ok!” Taylor groaned and let go of Karlie’s hand to reach for her phone. She typed in her password and selected the music.

She scrolled through it with her brows furrowed for a few moments, glancing at the road in between.

“I’ll show you one song.”

Karlie made an unintelligible sound.

“Just one? Taylorrr!”

Taylor laughed.

“Wait, I just need to decide on one … hmm.”

There was more intense scrolling with furrowed brows. Karlie got impatient and handed Taylor the aux cord.

“Please, Taylor. It’s not that big of a deal.”

“Okay, I know which one.”

Taylor looked up from her phone at Karlie and let out a deep breath. Without another word, she pressed play.

_My castle crumbled overnight_ _  
I brought a knife to a gunfight_

They listened to the song in silence. Karlie looked at Taylor, who was looking at the road and glancing at Karlie every other second. Taylor was holding her breath. Karlie was holding the edge of her seat.

_So call it what you want, yeah, call it what you want to …_

The song ended, and Taylor quickly pressed pause before another one could start. Karlie looked at her for a moment longer, then spoke.

“I loved it. It’s an amazing song, Tay.”

Taylor exhaled audibly.

“I’m glad you like it.”

“Are you saying my name in the song? I know it’s supposed to be ‘call it’ but it kinda sounds like my name” Karlie chuckled.

Taylor simply looked at her with a raised eyebrow and said nothing.

“I know you did that on purpose, Tay. I know you did.”

Taylor only made a vague gesture and grinned.

Then Karlie’s expression got serious again.

“I really loved the song, Tay. But I … did you … “

She sighed. “Why male pronouns?”

Taylor knew that question would come, and yet she felt a pang in her heart.

“I … it was the only thing I could do” she said sadly.

“Oh, yeah … I just thought, because you said you want to come out and stuff …” Karlie trailed off.

“I know. But it’s not that easy. I’m still stuck with this record label, and you know what’s in my contract … it’s not gonna be a one-time thing. It’s gonna be a process. So for now we have to stick to male pronouns …”

“I know” Karlie said quietly.

She wasn’t really sure if she did. But it was all she could offer at the moment.

They said nothing for a while, both staring out of the window. Big Sur was getting farther away with each beautiful rock formation and bed of wildflowers that they passed, and LA was getting closer. They were in between two worlds. Both could feel the magnificence of this moment. It was just them – and everything Taylor would show the world in less than a month. But for now, the album only belonged to the two of them.

“You said only one song, but can we listen to another one?”

Karlie broke the silence after a while. She didn’t want to beg Taylor. But she also really wanted to hear every new song.

“Okay” Taylor replied simply.

“I’m not as nervous anymore right now.”

A small chuckle escaped her lips. Karlie had a hard time believing her, but she didn’t argue.

Taylor took her phone in her hand again and selected another song after a while.

“Okay, I really hope you like this one and-“

“Taylor!” Karlie interrupted. “I will like it. I love it already. Just play it.”

So Taylor did.

“ _Gorgeous_.” A child’s voice sounded through the speaker, and Karlie startled a little.

Taylor grinned.

_You should take it as a compliment_

_That I got drunk and made fun of the way you talk_

_You should think about the consequence_

_Of your magnetic field being a little too strong_

Karlie raised an eyebrow and looked amusedly at Taylor, who kept her eyes on the road, pretending not to see it.

The song kept playing, and Karlie found herself dancing to it in her seat. She felt a little weird to dance to a song that was so obviously about her, but she didn’t want to mind. All she cared about was that Taylor knew how much she appreciated it.

The song ended. Taylor rushed to press pause again, then looked at Karlie.

“I loved it” Karlie said softly.

“I’m glad.” Taylor smiled at Karlie.

“I told you I was gonna love your songs!”

Taylor said nothing, instead reached out her hand to Karlie. She took it and smiled her wide signature smile right back at Taylor.

“I have to say though, you didn’t have to tell the whole world how you make fun of my pronunciation” Karlie pouted.

Taylor laughed.

“Oh yes, I did. It was very _im-por-thunt_.”

“Shut up” Karlie laughed and jerked Taylor’s hand away playfully.

They grinned at each other.

“Okay, now the rest of the album, please.”

Taylor groaned in response.

“Okay, okay!”

Karlie did a fist-pump in the air.

“But only after we’ve stopped at the next rest stop. I have to pee, and I want some coffee” Taylor announced.

“Ohh, someone’s hungry already” Karlie teased.

“No. Just coffee.”

Neither of them could wipe the grin off their faces. The next rest stop came a mile later, and they stopped for coffee and cookies.

They got back in the car again, and Taylor played more songs for Karlie. Karlie loved every song, and made sure to point out her favorite parts of each of them. 

Taylor didn’t play them in order, but whatever song she felt like playing next. It was an emotional rollercoaster. One minute they were jamming along to _End Game_. Karlie sang the words wrong, and Taylor laughed at her with a lump in her throat. The next Karlie had tears in her eyes from listening to _New Year’s Day_. Taylor couldn’t have imagined a better time and place to introduce Karlie to the album. She wouldn’t have it any other way.

When there were only two songs left to show Karlie, Taylor got nervous again. Karlie looked at her expectantly but didn’t say anything.

Taylor cleared her throat, her finger hovering over the play button.

“This one’s called _Dancing with our hands tied_.”

 

 

 


	4. Four

„Why?“ Karlie groaned in frustration and pushed herself back on her desk chair. The chair rolled backwards and was stopped by the carpet on the floor. She stared at the laptop screen from the distance, squinting to read the error message it was showing.

“Fuck this” she mumbled as she steered the chair back towards the desk. “I need more coffee.” She went into the kitchen. As she was waiting for the water to boil, she looked around the room. Blank walls, not a single plant on the window sill, and a bunch of dirty dishes in the sink. The only eye-catcher was a polaroid of her and Taylor on the fridge.

She poured the boiling water on top of the ground coffee in the pot and sighed. “I need to get out of here.”

After moving out of student housing, this apartment had been the next best thing she could find. It wasn’t ideal. It was on a busy street. There was a construction site nearby that started making noise at 6 am every morning. The neighbors were loud, though she had never seen them in person. She had known as soon as she had stepped in that this wasn’t a forever home. It wasn’t supposed to be. But for some reason, living here was lonelier and colder than she had imagined.

She went back into the room and started pacing back and forth, looking everywhere but her laptop screen. The room was bigger than her dorm room, but less cozy. _Might have something to do with those unpacked boxes in the corner,_ she thought and sighed again. _I miss Taylor._

She went to the window and looked down onto the street. Traffic was busy as usual, and the people on the sidewalk were hurrying along. It was already beginning to get dark, and it was drizzling. She put her arms around herself, craving warmth.

 _At least tomorrow is gonna be exciting_ , she thought and went back into the kitchen. She poured the coffee into one of the mugs Taylor had given her as a move-in gift, and grabbed the almond milk from the fridge.

Unexpectedly, her phone started ringing from the other room. She startled and nearly spilled the beverage. She rushed to get the phone. It was Kimby.

“Hey Karls, what are you up to?” her younger sister asked cheerfully.

“Ugh … just doing some work” Karlie said non-chalantly.

“Sounds good. How’s it going?”

“I don’t know, honestly … I ran into a problem with the formatting earlier and don’t know how to fix it … I think I’ll have to go to the office tomorrow and have one of the others look at it.”

“Oh, okay” Kimby simply replied. She knew how much her sister hated going to the office and tried to work from home as much as possible.

“Why are you asking, though?” Karlie asked.

Kimby hummed. “Kari and I wanted to take you out for dinner tomorrow.”

“Oh.”

“You wanna come?”

“What’s the occasion?”

“Well,” Kimby started. “Reputation comes out tomorrow, that’s a reason to celebrate.”

So the twins had had the album release on their minds, too. Of course they had, Karlie thought amused.

“And second of all,” Kimby continued.

Karlie interrupted her. “You didn’t say first of all” she joked. Talking to her sister had lightened her mood considerably.

“Shut up Karlie. And second of all, I know you’re miserable in that little apartment of yours and you need to go out more.”

“I’m not.”

“Yes you are, and you’re a bad liar at that. Jeez. I don’t get why you don’t just take up Taylor’s offer to move in with her and-“

“Not right now, Kimby” Karlie groaned.

She set her coffee mug on her desk and rubbed her temple.

She didn’t want to talk about it. When she had been looking for an apartment of her own, she had lived with Taylor for two weeks. It had been perfect. She had stayed over at Taylor’s place – no matter if Rhode Island, LA, Nashville or here in New York – more times than she could count. But actually living together for more than a few days at a time had been different. It had been perfect. But Karlie needed her independence. She didn’t want to rely on Taylor. So now here she was.

When Karlie stayed silent, Kimby continued.

“Okay. But do you wanna come? Kari gets off work at 6 tomorrow, so we can meet at 7. Let’s go to that vegan Vietnamese restaurant from last time?”

Karlie knew Kimby was right. She needed to go out more.

“Alright, I’m coming. Thank you” she said softly.

“No worries. I’m happy to see you. Bye!”

Just like that, Kimby hung up.

Karlie grinned and shook her head. Having her little not-so-little-anymore sisters with her in New York was a blessing she didn’t appreciate enough.

She went back to her desk to look at the problem once more with a fresh mind.

 

***

 

Karlie felt a rush of warm air hit her as she opened the door to the restaurant. She held her umbrella outside the door to shake off the water, then turned around to look for her sisters. Almost all of the tables were occupied, and chatter filled the room. Her eyes quickly landed on the twins. They had turned around simultaneously, a habit everyone who knew them always found creepy. The other guests didn’t take any notice of her.

She went to their table, and they exchanged hugs and greetings.

“Mum says hi, too” Kariann said when Karlie sat down.

“I talked to her on the phone yesterday.”

Karlie smiled and thanked her.

“How’s work?”

The twins told her about their internships until it was time to order. Karlie hadn’t even taken a look at the menu yet, so she simply ordered the large soup she had the last time. She felt like it was perfect for the cold and wet weather outside.

They resumed their conversation.

“I can’t wait for my internship to end in January” Kariann groaned.

“It’s boring. I don’t enjoy working in an office.”

“What do you wanna do after it?” Karlie asked.

Kimby simply looked between them.

Kariann shrugged.

“Go back to St Louis for a while, maybe.”

Karlie raised her eyebrows, but Kimby seemed like she already knew of her sister’s plan. All four of the Kloss sisters were close, but nothing could get between the special bond the twins shared, so it was of no surprise to Karlie.

“Yeah, I mean you don’t have to stay here if you don’t want to” she offered.

Karlie knew that the twins wouldn’t stay in NYC forever, and it would be selfish of her to ask them to move here.

“I might actually stay at my internship for a while longer or change the contract to a part-time job” Kimby chimed in. “They take me on a lot of appointments outside of the office so it’s pretty cool.”

“That’s great!” Karlie said enthusiastically.

Another thing she admired about the twins was that they never held grudges against each other. If one of them was having a hard time, the other one would support her, but there was never any jealousy about boyfriends, or friends, or jobs.

Kariann smiled at Kimby good-naturedly.

Their drinks came, and the conversation was briefly interrupted.

They made a toast.

“To Reputation!” Kimby said, causing the other two to laugh.

“And to Karlie leaving the house!”

“Hey!” Karlie’s protest was drowned out by the clinking of their glasses.

Karlie took a sip and put her glass down again. She felt ridiculous making a toast with a mango lassi.

“So” Kariann started, a mischievous glint in her eyes.

Karlie knew that the previous conversation was over and would probably not be resumed all night. She braced herself.

“About Rep …” Kimby started and grinned.

Karlie did her best not to blush.

“Yeah. You two like it?”

The twins chuckled.

“Aww, she’s so nervous.”

“Hey, you two can hear each other’s thoughts, so keep those comments to yourselves, okay” Karlie said in mock-offense.

“Spill the tea, Karlie.”

The twins looked at her with raised eyebrows. Kimby was tapping her fingers on the table.

“What tea? I’m drinking a mango lassi” Karlie replied lamely at an attempt to be funny.

Kariann groaned.

“Kimby, you ask her.”

“No, you.”

Karlie looked between the twins in confusion. She knew they were being dramatic at her expense. Usually they would have this kind of banter silently.

“Did you actually carve your name into Taylor’s bedpost?” Kimby asked with a straight face.

Karlie started blushing furiously and put her hands over her face.

“I think that’s a yes” Kariann whispered to Kimby.

“Guys …” Karlie started.

“You’re embarrassing.”

“We wanna knoooowww” Kimby said dramatically and leaned forward slightly.

“Can we please talk more quietly? We’re in public” Karlie begged.

Kimby rolled her eyes, but Kariann seemed to understand the request.

“Okay, we do what we always do?”

Kimby and Karlie nodded in response. Over the years, they had established a system to use the twins’ skills to their advantage when talking in public. Even though neither Karlie nor their older sister Kristine possessed any conjuring skills, they had learned how to integrate themselves into the twins’ silent conversations.

 _You guys are embarrassing!_ Karlie did her best to think loud and clear and grinned triumphantly when the twins flinched at the ‘volume’.

Kariann could hear everyone’s thoughts. Kimby could hear Kariann’s thoughts. The twins spoke out loud what they wanted Karlie to hear. It was like an advanced game of telephone.

“Did you carve your name into Alison’s bedpost?” Kimby asked again.

Alison was their codename for Taylor when they were talking about her in public. Obviously, there were many Taylors in the world, but not that many who released new albums or went on world tours. Karlie was rather safe and silly than sorry.

Karlie groaned.

_I’m not answering that._

The twins gave her a disapproving look, but said nothing. Karlie assumed they were communicating silently about what inappropriate question to ask her next.

“How did you manage to keep quiet about the album for like an entire month after she played it for you?” Kariann asked more quietly.

There was a hint of amusement in her voice. “I would have died.”

Karlie giggled. _It was hard to not sneak into Taylor’s phone and send the songs to everyone I know._

She looked around the room, as if someone else there would also be able to hear her thoughts. Her eyes landed on the twins again. They were waiting for her to continue.

_But yeah, it was actually pretty cool to have the songs all for myself, you know. At least the songs she didn’t release before the album. Right now I feel … exposed, if that’s the right word. I don’t know. I’ve been reading fans’ reactions online, and yours too … it’s like the secret is out._

Karlie sighed and took a sip from her drink. She didn’t look at the twins again, instead looked at her hands that were resting on the table.

_Even though we’re not … out, I mean. Oh God, that’s a whole different topic … but I’ve seen fans’ speculations that the lyrics are impossible to be about a man, or they can’t really find a man to relate them to, and I’m not one of Taylor’s famous friends and we don’t get seen together in public that much but still … it’s only a matter of time until someone makes a connection._

She let out another heavy breath. She always felt that when she was communicating to the twins via her thoughts, she was rambling even more than when she did with spoken words. The twins however didn’t seem to mind and were hanging on to every word Karlie sent their way.

_Taylor and I have talked about her coming out plans after our vacation, obviously, and I think I’m warming up to the idea. But I’m scared someone is gonna find out before we get a chance to announce it to the world or whatever and ruin it, or that Taylor will have to publicly date men again …_

Karlie kept her eyes glued to the table. She put her arms around herself, feeling vulnerable. Kimby reached out her hand to place it on Karlie’s arm, causing the older girl to look up.

Kimby’s eyes were full of understanding and sympathy.

“I can’t see what’s going to happen _that_ far ahead” she tried to crack a joke – it worked, and a small smile escaped Karlie’s lips – “but I’m sure that’s not gonna happen. You two have been doing so well over the last four years. Tree is a pro at taking down pap pictures from gossip sites. Taylor is a pro at telling people she’s single. You’re a pro at being a nobody-“

“Hey!” Karlie protested out loud, causing several people on the nearby tables to look at them.

Kimby and Kariann simply laughed. The conversation had become serious for a moment, but the twins didn’t want their sister to worry tonight. They wanted her to have fun, and to gush about Taylor.

Their food came, and they were distracted for a moment. They started eating, and Kariann changed the topic to something more light-hearted.

“I saw the videos Taylor posted on her Insta Story this morning, they were super cute” she said and smiled.

It worked, and Karlie smiled widely. Taylor and her background singers had been spending the morning at record stores, buying the album for fans and taking selfies.

“Yeah, it was so sweet. I really admire how she is so good with her fans.” She didn’t stop smiling. “When we were talking on the phone today she was still so giddy about it.”

Kimby rolled her eyes dramatically. “Okay, we get it, you’re somehow still in your honeymoon phase, God.”

Karlie didn’t seem to hear her. “I can’t wait to have her back here in two days …”

 _Stop ruining the moment_ , Kariann scolded her twin silently.

Kimby chuckled.

_Just because you can’t keep ‘em around-_

Kimby gasped in mock-offense. Kariann simply grinned.

Karlie had only now realized that the twins had stopped listening to her rambling on about Taylor and crossed her arms.

“Thanks for listening, guys.”

“We were listening, I promise!” Kariann said a little too defensively a little too quickly.

Karlie amusedly raised an eyebrow.

“But we still wanna know more about the time she played the album for you for the first time! You can tell us, we’re your favorite sisters, we can keep secrets” Kimby continued, making puppy-eyes for emphasis.

Karlie tilted her head a little. “Is that so?”

She quickly sheltered her thoughts, and could tell from Kariann’s facial expression that the girl noticed immediately. She smirked.

She let her memories go back to her and Taylor in the car on the ride back from Big Sur. How Taylor had played her the album and had been so nervous. How she had saved two extra special songs for last. _Dancing with our hands tied_ had left both of them an emotional mess, so much so that Taylor had to pull over and take deep breaths. She had played _Dress_ while they were parked next to the road. It had let to a make-out session in the car, and they had only cared very little if passersby saw. Karlie smiled to herself again. Yeah, the twins definitely didn’t need to know all the details.

She opened her thoughts to Kariann again. Her sister looked at her expectantly.

_To quote_ _Hamlet_ _Act III Scene III Line 87 … No._

Kariann groaned in response.

_Your jokes have been better._

Then she remembered Karlie couldn’t hear thoughts in return.

“Your jokes have been better.”

Karlie laughed, but didn’t say anything else. She returned her attention to her food that she had been neglecting for the past couple of minutes.

The twins followed suit, letting the topic rest. Or maybe they were having another silent discussion, but Karlie couldn’t be bothered. Despite all their teasing, she was genuinely grateful for the twins’ interest and excitement about Taylor’s new record. Since the night they had initially met Taylor, the twins had shared a special bond with the singer. Karlie let her thoughts wander to the concert in St Louis and smiled about how far they had come. Who would’ve ever thought.

She only realized that Kariann had been listening to her thoughts when she saw the girl grinning from across the table for the umpteenth time that night. Her cheeks flushed red. Kariann, however, didn’t tease her about it and only gave her a curious look.

They ordered baked banana for dessert. Karlie decided to bring up something she had been thinking about for a while but needed reassurance for.

A wide grin appeared on her face. “So I have an idea for Taylor’s birthday …”


	5. Five

 

The room was quiet, only the noises of the traffic filling it with muffled sounds. The last rays of sunshine of the day were shining in through the windows, creating long shadows from the furniture.

Taylor was absentmindedly running her fingers up and down Karlie’s arm, who seemed to be almost asleep. The warmth between their bodies under the blankets and the softness of Karlie’s skin was addicting to her, and she tried to commit the moment to memory as best as she could. Karlie let out a soft sigh and tried to cuddle even closer.

After a while, Taylor couldn’t ignore her empty stomach any longer.

“Karlie” she whispered.

“Hmmm.”

“Let’s get up and make dinner.”

“Uggghh.”

“I’m really hungry.”

“Hmmm.”

“I’m serious.”

Karlie hummed in response once more, then grabbed Taylor’s waist to keep her from getting up.                                                                                                               

“Babe … we can do this again after dinner” she laughed, trying to reason with her sleepy girlfriend.

“ _This_?” Karlie asked teasingly and looked up at Taylor, wiggling her eyebrows.

“Oh, so you _were_ listening, I thought you were asleep” Taylor grinned but didn’t elaborate.

“I’m gonna borrow one of your sweaters” she announced and got up.

The cold air gave her goosebumps, and she quickly made her way to the small bag she had brought to put on new underwear, then went to Karlie’s closet to grab a sweater.

Looking at her girlfriend’s wardrobe and all the familiar pieces of clothing, she let herself get lost in her thoughts for a moment. It was good to be back in New York. She rummaged through a pile of clothes at the bottom.

“The Genius sweater will do” she proudly announced when she found it, causing Karlie to groan again.

“I can’t believe you didn’t bring your own sweater” Karlie said drily and sat up in bed, keeping the blankets around her body.

“I did, but I like yours better” Taylor replied and stuck out her tongue at Karlie.

She wanted to add something, but seeing Karlie sitting there like that she needed all her self-control to not join her again right away and skip dinner. She quickly turned around again and went into the kitchen.

The kitchen was colder than the bedroom, and she let out a deep breath.

“Can’t we just get take-out?” she heard Karlie ask from the next room. It sounded like she had finally gotten up as well.

“No? I brought groceries, remember?” Taylor asked confused.

It was unlike Karlie to suggest take-out. Usually she was the one who always made sure to eat healthy and home-made meals. Taylor’s glance fell on the trash can. An empty pizza box as well as a Chinese take-out box were sticking out. She raised an eyebrow. This was definitely unlike Karlie.

She carefully glanced back into the room towards Karlie, who was getting dressed. It dawned on her that the taller girl had been acting unlike herself for a while. She simply had been too busy to notice. It wasn’t about their relationship. Taylor knew that. Karlie was the sunshine she knew and loved. Taylor realized what was different about Karlie was her attitude towards everything else in her life. As if she didn’t know what to do with herself.

She had no time to ponder further as Karlie was walking into the room, wearing sweatpants and one of Taylor’s old sweaters she hadn’t seen in a while. She looked cute with her hair all messy and face flushed, and Taylor told her.

“Thanks, babe” Karlie said shyly and hid her face away from Taylor by wrapping her in a hug.

“I’m actually hungry too. What are we making?”

“I thought we could make the one-pot pasta recipe I sent you the other week. I haven’t tried it yet.”

Taylor hoped her voice sounded normal and not like she had just had a realization that made her want to burst into tears. She definitely needed to address it. Tonight.

“Awesome! You know I love everything you cook” Karlie said and gave Taylor a kiss on the cheek, then separated to unpack the grocery bag.

Taylor stood there dumbfounded for a moment longer. How Karlie could still conjure up all these butterflies in her stomach always amazed her. One simple touch, one simple kiss, and it all felt like days since they first admitted their feelings for each other, not years.

She snapped out of it and joined Karlie in the dinner preparations.

Karlie had started humming a song Taylor didn’t recognize.

“What song is that?”

Karlie burst out laughing.

“Oh, you haven’t heard it yet? It’s by this singer called Taylor Swift, she has a new album out that I’ve been listening to non-stop, you should give it a listen!”

“Shut up” Taylor retorted, feeling embarrassed.

“What song was that supposed to be?”

“Gorgeous!”

“Ehhh … I think you’re really bad at humming.”

“Shut up.” Karlie playfully shoved Taylor’s shoulder, and Taylor countered. Soon enough they were having a pretend-fight over nothing in particular in front of the hot stove, and laughter filled the kitchen.

“The water is boiling, Karlie! We need to put the pasta in!” Taylor managed to get out between giggles and reached for the package.

“Okay, okay, serious cooking, got it” Karlie laughed and stepped aside.

Taylor rolled her eyes. “I just wanna finish this before I starve.”

“I’m not stopping you.”

They continued to prepare the dish, all the while making each other laugh with silly jokes.

“Let’s eat on the couch, it’s more comfy and warmer” Taylor suggested when they were done and Karlie was getting the plates out of the cabinet.

Karlie agreed.

“We can watch the sunset!”

Taylor went into the room. Indeed, the sun had started setting. She looked at her phone, confused about the time. It was only a little after 4pm. _Oh yeah, winter time,_ she thought.

She rearranged the couch a little so it would face the window. The wide window faced west, and there were no buildings in the neighborhood that were significantly taller than the one Karlie lived in. Perfect for watching sunsets.

They sat down, sharing the blanket and started eating.

“This is so good, Taylor.”

Karlie spoke with a full mouth for emphasis.

“I’m glad you like it.”

Their previous giggles had been replaced by the sounds of the forks hitting the plates, but nevertheless the light mood between them remained.

They finished their meal and put the dishes into the sink. The wash-up could wait.

The sky had turned into a beautiful blend of red, orange and pink. The headlights of the traffic were shining through the dawn in the distance. Lights were being turned on in the windows, and people were quickening their pace to get home before the dark. They didn’t seem to take a moment and look up at the sky. The city kept bustling around them, but to Taylor and Karlie it felt like they were the only two people there. They were sitting on the couch in silence. Sharing a blanket, sitting close to each other, admiring the way the colors kept changing almost by the minute.

Taylor studied Karlie’s face intensely. She loved the way her green eyes mixed with the indigo of the sunset. The pink skies nearly faded in comparison to Karlie’s beauty.

She felt the need to tell her as much but couldn’t find the right words. Instead, she leaned over to embrace Karlie. Karlie smiled softly and let herself be pulled in.

They sat in silence for a few more minutes, then Taylor spoke up.

“Karlie.”

“Yeah?”

Karlie turned her head to look at Taylor. She could make out her features in the dimly lit room, if barely.

“Tell me what’s going on.”

Karlie’s breath hitched in her throat, and her grip on Taylor’s waist loosened. In the next moment, she held on twice as strong. Taylor let her. Neither of them said anything.

“How … how do you know I haven’t been doing well?” Karlie finally asked.

Taylor almost took offense to the question.

“Karlie … I know you pretty well, remember? And you’re not as good at hiding your feelings as you think you are.”

Karlie simply hummed in response. She didn’t dare look Taylor in the eyes.

“I’ve been noticing for a while now, but I couldn’t quite place it. But you seem like you’ve been out of it for a while, haven’t you?” Taylor asked softly.

“I’ve been busy with the album release and all and I’m sorry for not addressing this sooner” she added and bit her lip. She didn’t want to cry in front of Karlie or make this about herself when Karlie obviously needed her.

“No … it’s not your fault, Tay” Karlie mumbled.

“I don’t know what’s been going on … I don’t feel like myself, I guess.”

Taylor gently ran her fingers up and down Karlie’s arm, just as she had done earlier, to encourage her to continue speaking.

Karlie looked up at Taylor. Their eyes met.

“It has nothing to do with you, that’s all I know. I’m at my best when we’re together. I’m a mess when we’re not.”

Taylor’s heart started beating faster.

“Yeah, I felt like you stopped telling me about what you’ve been up to when we’re not together. You never elaborate how your day was, or what you’re looking forward to on the weekend” she said, hoping it didn’t sound accusatory.

“That’s because I’m not up to anything” Karlie said with frustration in her voice.

“I don’t like my job, I don’t like this apartment, and I hardly ever get to see my friends because we’re all busy.”

Karlie’s lips quivered. She hated crying. She didn’t want to cry in front of Taylor. She didn’t want her pity. Taylor brought her thumb to Karlie’s cheek, and as if on cue a tear rolled down Karlie’s face.

“Dammit” Karlie mumbled and brought her sleeves to her face to wipe it away, but Taylor held her arm.

“Shh, Karlie. It’s okay. You don’t need to be embarrassed.”

They had cried in front of each other before. They had experienced almost every possible human emotion together before. And yet, Karlie wanted to play strong. Taylor wasn’t having it.

She gave her a kiss on the cheek and pulled her close again. Soon enough, Karlie’s quiet sobs were sounding close to Taylor’s ears. All Taylor could do was hold Karlie and wait for her to talk.

“I just … don’t know what I’m doing with my life” Karlie started after a while, voice shaking.

“I don’t know. I don’t want this job, but I don’t want a new one, either. The twins have been in New York for months but I don’t see them that much. I don’t see any of my friends as much anymore, either. Cara, Derek, Jourdan … we’re all busy. I hate it. I want to live next door to Jourdan again, and hang out in the library with Cara. Go to the gym with Derek. I don’t know …” Karlie’s voice had become quieter with each sentence, Taylor had to pay close attention to not miss anything.

“I know what you mean, Karlie. I don’t know what to tell you … that’s being an adult, I guess. It gets lonely” Taylor offered.

Karlie sighed.

“Yeah … I guess you’re right. I don’t know. I’m lonely, yeah. I mean, I have friends, but still … do you think they feel the same way?”

Taylor chuckled good-naturedly. “I don’t know Karlie. I can imagine that. Maybe you should talk to them about it?”

Karlie groaned. “It just feels like everyone is out there living their lives, and I’m missing out on everything.”

“I can guarantee you that that’s not the case” Taylor reassured her.

“I know I’m not the person with the most ordinary job in the world, but it gets lonely even for me. Being an adult means being on your own. But that doesn’t mean you’re alone with what you’re feeling.”

Karlie thought about that for a while.

“Yeah … I guess you’re right.” She looked at Taylor again.

“Thank you.”

She gave her a kiss, and then another one. Taylor sensed that for Karlie, the conversation was over and she wanted to move onto other things. But she didn’t want to let Karlie off the hook so easily. She had more things she wanted to say, and more things she wanted to hear from Karlie.

So Taylor pulled away, and kept Karlie at a distance.

“Karlie” she said, seeing the taller girl’s confused look, “I want to talk more.”

“Okay …” Karlie responded, sounding insecure.

Taylor decided to just dive right in.

“What do you want to do now?”

“What do you mean?”

“Come on, Karlie. You figured out what’s bothering you in your life. Are you going to resolve it?”

Karlie groaned.

“I … yeah, maybe” she said defeated.

“Maybe I should call my friends and ask them to talk what we just talked about.”

“That sounds like a good idea.”

Karlie grinned ever so slightly in response.

Taylor felt like she shouldn’t push the subject, but couldn’t help but ask: “And the rest?”

Karlie shrugged. “I might start looking for another job. I mean the work at this one is okay, I just hate my colleagues” she laughed drily. “And I also don’t like working from … here” she made a gesture towards the room.

Taylor bit her tongue to not ask the question she really wanted to ask. She felt ironic that she wanted Karlie to tell her what was on her mind, but couldn’t do so herself. She had asked the question a million times, it felt like. Karlie was stubborn. The three weeks they had lived together had been heaven, at least for Taylor. She knew that Karlie had loved it as well, but she had seemed eager to get her own place again. But Taylor wanted more. She wanted to wake up next to Karlie every morning, and cook her dinner every evening. She wanted to come home to her. She wanted to wait up for Karlie to come home to her.

She realized she hadn’t responded to Karlie’s previous utterance yet.

“Yeah …” she said vaguely. She didn’t know what else to say. She wanted to ask Karlie to move in with her again.

Taylor sighed audibly. She caressed Karlie’s cheek with her thumb again. Her skin felt sticky from her dried tears.

Karlie closed her eyes and leaned in again, and this time Taylor let her. She let Karlie kiss her carefully at first, then passionately.

In the meantime, the sun had gone down completely. Red and orange had turned into pink and indigo and then darkness.

Both were breathing irregularly now. Between kisses, Taylor looked into Karlie’s eyes. The genuine adoration she read in them made her heart beat even faster. She could only hope hers were mirroring the same emotion.

Her hands trailed from Karlie’s waist up her body until they came together on Karlie’s neck, gently holding her head in place.

Taylor spoke softly before kissing Karlie again.

“You are my favorite everything.”

She was determined to show her how much she meant it.


	6. Six

 

 **Sunshine** 🌞

Are you home yet? I’m omw

_11:23 am_

 

Taylor felt her phone buzzing in her pocket and tried to retrieve it as subtly as possible. She opened the text under the table and smiled. When she glanced to her side, she could see Tree giving her a stare. She rolled her eyes at her publicist and quickly typed out a reply. She always felt like a student who was being scolded for not paying attention in class. But she was the boss here, and she would look at her phone if she wanted to.

 

 **Tay** 😻

No, the meeting will go a little longer than expected. I’ll let you know when it’s over!

_11:24 am_

 

Karlie got off the subway when she read Taylor’s response. Her heart sank a little. She had wanted Taylor to be home already. _Oh well, I’ll just bake something until she comes back_ , she thought as she climbed up the stairs to the street level. She walked to the apartment and let herself in with the key, and texted security that she was there. The usual procedure.

 

 **Sunshine** 🌞

Alrighty!

_11:24 am_

 

Karlie’s use of the word ‘home’ hadn’t escaped Taylor. She smiled to herself. She could still feel Tree’s death stare on her. She was totally paying attention, Tree didn’t have to worry. Something about the security policy of the stadiums they had booked for her upcoming tour … something something. She let herself slip into a dangerous daydream. She thought about what it would be like to come home to Karlie later, who was probably arriving at her place at this very moment. She thought about what it would be like to come home to Karlie every day like this. She read the text again, smiling at the word ‘home’. Karlie had used it so naturally. Didn’t it feel natural to Karlie, too? She sent a quick text back and forced herself to snap out of it, before Tree would murder her with her eyes.

 **Tay** 😻

💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕

_11:25 am_

***

 

“I’m home!” Taylor called when she entered the door.

“Hey babe!” Karlie’s voice sounded from the kitchen.

Taylor felt her whole body tingling. How she wanted this every day.

She took off her coat and shoes and went into the kitchen.

“What smells so good in here?”

Instead of a response, she was wrapped into a tight hug by Karlie and meowed at by her two cats who were sitting on the kitchen island.

“Hey” Karlie said softly, and Taylor reciprocated the hug. She gave her a quick kiss, then looked her up and down.

“Hey, that’s my apron!”

Karlie rolled her eyes playfully.

“But you can wear it, it’s cute on you, I guess” Taylor added drily.

She turned around to Meredith and Olivia, who were jumping off the kitchen island just then.

“These two know just as well as you that they’re not allowed to sit on there!” she said, but couldn’t hide the grin from spreading across her face.

“What kind of shenanigans have you three been up to while I was gone?”

Karlie grinned back at her: “Oh, I baked some cookies, and then it was lunchtime and I got hungry so I made some Indian curry. Where did you get all those spices in your cabinet from?”

Taylor made a grimace. “Had to practice” she mumbled under her breath, but Karlie heard her and burst out laughing.

“Well, okay. At least the packages weren’t empty” she winked.

Taylor narrowed her eyes in mock-offense.

“Anyways! Where are the cookies?”

“They’re for after lunch, Taylor.”

Taylor sighed. “Ok, ok!”

“But lunch is almost done! Why don’t you set the table?” Karlie suggested.

Taylor agreed and started opening some cabinets. Karlie watched her from the stove and noticed her outfit for the first time. Taylor was wearing an oversized purple sweater with a black snake on it.

Karlie giggled. “That shirt is very on brand, Taylor.”

“I know right?” Taylor looked up.

“Tree loved it, too.”

“Speaking of her, how was the meeting?”

“It was good, talked about tour stuff.”

Taylor started taking the cutlery out of the drawer.

“Oh, before I forget, Tree will come over this afternoon. We have to talk about my fan listening party.”

“Oh … okay.”

“You don’t have to talk to her if you don’t want to” Taylor said softly.

She knew that Tree would ask her about Taylor’s coming out plans, and Karlie still needed time to make up her mind whether she wanted to be introduced as Taylor’s girlfriend at the party or not.

“No, I’ll say hello to her. But I’ll just go upstairs then, I still have some leftover work from this morning” Karlie said and shrugged.

They looked at each other, each trying to read the other’s reaction.

“That’s alright!” Taylor replied and smiled encouragingly.

Karlie smiled back. Taylor took the cutlery and plates and went into the dining room to set the table, and Karlie turned off the stove and prepared to take the pot to the next room as well.

“Thank you for cooking, this is so good” Taylor said when they were sitting down and the food had cooled down enough to eat.

“You’re welcome. I love cooking at your place” Karlie laughed.

Taylor felt a pang in her chest at Karlie’s utterance.

“You’re always welcome to cook here” was all she could think of saying.

_In fact, you’re always welcome to stay here. All the time. Please._

Karlie smiled at her. Taylor was glad that Karlie possessed no conjuring skills and could not hear her thoughts.

“It’s just more fun to cook here, I don’t know. Even if it’s the same dish. I haven’t cooked at my own place in a while” Karlie continued. She didn’t look at Taylor, instead looking down at her plate like she hadn’t prepared this meal herself and knew exactly what was in it.

Taylor’s heart started beating faster, and she started chewing more slowly, afraid she would choke on it otherwise.

“Yeah, I noticed” Taylor said, but didn’t elaborate. The image of the empty take-out cartons popped up in her mind.

“But when you and I were cooking together the other day, it felt different. I was enjoying myself. It felt like we were here, or at your Rhode Island house.”

Taylor held her breath.

“You just make anywhere feel like home” Karlie continued quietly.

Taylor felt like she couldn’t breathe. It took everything in her to not shout out ‘then move in with me! Live here! With me!’. She placed the fork down on the table with a shaky hand.

“Karlie … you know you’re always welcome here. You can always cook here. You can always stay over …”

Karlie quickly glanced up at Taylor, then looked down at her plate again. Taylor could have sworn Karlie’s eyes were shimmering with tears.

“Thank, you, Tay. I know. I appreciate it” she said so quietly, Taylor almost didn’t hear it.

Taylor didn’t know what to do. She wanted to reach her hand out to Karlie’s, but the other girl had a death grip on her fork, and her other hand was under the table.

They continued eating in silence. The tension was almost palpable. It wasn’t an awkward silence, but an uncomfortable one. Like there were a lot of things left unsaid. They didn’t dare look each other in the eyes, only stealing glances when they thought the other one wasn’t looking.

When they were both done, they quietly got up and brought the dishes into the kitchen. The kitchen was bright compared to the dimly lit dining room, and Karlie felt vulnerable.

She turned around to Taylor and leaned against the counter. Taylor looked up at her, a curious expression on her face. She hadn’t expected Karlie to turn around. Not being able to withstand the silence any longer, Karlie reached out and pulled Taylor close to her by her waist. Taylor let it happen, relieved that Karlie was showing any sign of response.

Karlie buried her face in Taylor’s hair. She loved how soft it was, and thought how well her natural curls suited her. Then her thoughts went back to what she wanted to say. She thought about how to articulate it.

Taylor beat her to it, speaking up first.

“Karlie … move in with me?”

They separated a little to look at each other. Taylor’s eyes were full of anticipation. Karlie’s reflected her indecisiveness.

“Taylor … I … I don’t know.” She took a deep breath. “My parents won’t allow it.”

Taylor took a step back, her eyes wide.

“What?”

Karlie smiled sadly.

“It’s not like I haven’t thought about it … I’m so much happier when I’m here, or anywhere with you, Tay. But I still need my independence. And, yeah … when I was living here with you when I was apartment hunting, my parents urged me to find my own place, and not to depend on you. They … I think they think you would spoil me, and I will never go to work again or something” she laughed drily.

Taylor let out a breath. She stood there, feeling small.

“I …” she didn’t know what to say. She thought that Karlie’s family had accepted her. She did her best to keep Karlie away from the craziness that was her life most of the time. But Karlie’s parents still seemed to be skeptical, even after all these years.

“Do you agree with them?” Taylor finally asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

“I … I don’t know” Karlie answered truthfully.

“It’s true that I do want my own independence, and I don’t want to depend on you. Like, would I pay rent? How would we go about this? But I don’t agree with them that you would spoil me. I mean, you would, but not that I would never work again a day in my life.”

Karlie ran a hand through her hair and looked at Taylor to see her reaction.

“I understand” Taylor simply said, seeming deep in thought.

Neither of them spoke for a few moments. The tapping of the cats’ feet somewhere in the next rooms and the humming of the refrigerator suddenly became prominent sounds.

“Do you think I’m not seeing this clearly enough? That I’m being too romantic?” Taylor asked finally.

“You’re always romantizising things, Tay” Karlie said in an attempt to lighten the mood. It worked, and Taylor grinned at her.

“But in all seriousness, yes, we need to talk about this more. We need to set clear conditions and boundaries before I move in. It’s not like I haven’t thought about it. I’m miserable in my place. I only like it when you’re there with me. And I know that we work well together, Tay. I have no doubt about that, we’ve done it before. But I need my independence, and I don’t wanna just live here for free.”

She took a deep breath, then continued.

“You know I could never afford a place like this. So if I move in here, we need to talk about my share of the rent and all that stuff. Even if it’s uncomfortable.”

Taylor looked at Karlie intensely, then nodded.

“Yeah, you’re right.” She sighed.

“I didn’t think about your side of the story. All I saw was that you’re not happy in your place, and how happy you are here and what I can offer you. I can talk to your parents if you want to. I know they mean well and they want to protect you. But I can promise them I won’t turn their hard-working, stubborn daughter into a slob” she grinned.

Karlie grinned back.

“You can also have your own office space” Taylor offered.

Karlie could sense that Taylor was already daydreaming in her head again, making up scenarios and planning out absolutely everything. She put up her hand.

“Taylor, one thing after the other.”

“Okay, okay.”

They both laughed.

This time Taylor closed the distance between them. She reached for Karlie’s face and kissed her. Karlie gladly reciprocated.

“Are we okay?” Karlie asked between kisses.

Taylor bit her lip. “Of course, Karlie. We’ll both think about it and then take baby steps, okay?” she asked softly.

“Yeah” Karlie nodded and smiled.

She leaned in again, already missing the taste of Taylor’s lips. There would be plenty of time to think about everything tomorrow.


	7. Seven

 

Taylor jumped in surprise when she heard her phone ringing from where it was lying on the table in the dining room. The standard ringtone was blasting through her apartment. As she went to grab her phone and answer the call, she realized how annoying the ringtone was.

_Karlie is right, I really have to change it._

She answered, and Selena’s face appeared on the screen.

“Hey Taylor!”

“Hey Sel!”

Taylor grinned at her friend, who was holding her phone way too close to her face.

“Give me a second, I was just in the kitchen. I’m gonna make a cup of tea and then I’m all ears.”

Selena laughed in response.

“Tea? Are you a grandma, Tay?”

Taylor held her phone so that Selena could see her sticking out her tongue. With her other hand she switched on the kettle.

“No, but unlike LA, NYC is cold at this time of the year. And I need my voice.”

“Alright, alright.” Selena gave in.

Taylor opened the cabinet with her free hand and grabbed a mug. Selena was about to say something, but Taylor didn’t hold on to the mug properly and dropped it.

She hastily took a step back, lifting her arms. She expected the mug to shatter on the floor, but instead it kept hovering in mid-air. She took in a sharp breath. She hadn’t even meant to use her skills. Realizing Selena was still on FaceTime, she quickly grabbed the mug out of the air and placed it back on the counter.

“Taylor?” she could hear Selena’s confused voice coming from her phone.

She leaned against the counter and hoped Selena wouldn’t notice how much her hands were suddenly shaking.

“What happened?”

“Oh.” Taylor cleared her throat.

“Nothing, just dropped my tea mug, but I grabbed it before it fell.”

She looked at the screen to gauge her friend’s reaction.

The brunette had her brows furrowed in confusion. Taylor could see it clearly because Selena had leaned towards the camera even more.

“Okay. Since when do you not have terrible hand-eye coordination?” she teased.

“Oh shut up” Taylor replied, glad her friend was cracking jokes. She wanted to ask her how much she had seen, but didn’t know how to casually bring it up.

“I’m alright, just had a bit of a start” she added and ran a hand through her hair.

Selena didn’t dwell on the topic and told Taylor to make her tea already so she could get comfortable on the couch and the two could catch up.

Taylor did, but it took her heart rate quite a few minutes to calm down again. While Selena was catching her up on her work and everything happening in LA, Taylor couldn’t help but think about what had happened.

_I totally used my skills without meaning to. That’s a first. Guess practice has paid off. Mike is gonna be happy about that._

She kept talking to Selena as if nothing else was on her mind, thankful for her multi-tasking abilities. She took a sip of her tea once it had cooled down.

_But Selena could have witnessed the mug hovering in mid-air … that would have been bad. I haven’t caused the CA any trouble in a long time, and I don’t need any right now. I hope she really didn’t see anything. She’s one of my best friends, but she can’t know._

“And so now we’re gonna give it as a Christmas present to grandma” Selena said and giggled.

Taylor snapped out of her thoughts and back into the conversation. Yeah, she totally knew what Selena was talking about right now.

She smiled at her friend.

“That’s great!”

Selena was still uncomfortably close to the camera as she smiled back at Taylor. The blonde singer could see every laugh line on her face. It made her miss her friend, and she wished they could meet up more often in person.

“What are you thinking about, Taylor?” Selena asked when Taylor didn’t add anything.

“Oh.” Taylor felt caught off-guard.

“I just thought how I wish we would see each other in person more often.” It wasn’t a lie.

Selena nodded.

“Karlie and I just had this conversation, too. I think she’s lonely …”

Taylor sighed.

“Is everything okay between you two?” Selena asked concerned.

Taylor could see her readjusting her sitting position. For the first time since their call she could actually see the background, the curtains of Selena’s hotel room.

“Yes, don’t worry, Sel.”

Taylor smiled genuinely.

“Between us everything is perfect. I just mean that she seems to be having a rough time adjusting to life after college … she doesn’t really like her job, or well the job is okay but not the people and the office, and she doesn’t see her friends very often. So yeah, I don’t know how to help her …”

Taylor’s smile faltered again and she furrowed her brows.

Selena tried to cheer her up.

“Hey, that’s a totally valid and normal thing to go through. Like you just said, we don’t see each other as much in person either, but you’re still my best friend.”

“I know” Taylor trailed off, but a smile crept onto her face again.

“It sucks, but that’s being an adult.” Selena said matter-of-factly.

“Speaking of Karlie-“

_Oh God please don’t ask._

“Did you ask her to move in with you yet? You’ve been talking about this for months.”

Taylor exhaled loudly.

“Oops, wrong question?”

Taylor smiled softly at her friend.

“Yeah, no, I don’t know … we did talk about it. It’s a bit complicated. I don’t want her to think that moving in with me will fix all of her other problems, you know? And she wants her independence. She’s not against the idea, though. I think we’ll do it gradually, I mean she already spends a lot of time at my place, anyways.”

Selena nodded in understanding.

“But I have something else I wanted to tell you!” Taylor said excitedly, eager to change the topic.

Selena’s eyes went wide.

“What is it? Are you pregnant?”

Taylor giggled in response.

“Very funny.”

“I mean, I don’t know, maybe Karlie is just that good …” Selena laughed and enjoyed her friend being visibly uncomfortable on her phone screen.

Taylor hid her blush by turning the phone away.

“Shut up, Selena.”

She picked up her tea again to avoid looking at her friend for a few seconds longer. Just then she caught a glimpse of Olivia entering the room and approaching the couch.

“Look who I’m talking to!” she said in her high-pitched cat-voice and turned the screen so Olivia could see Selena.

Olivia looked at the phone curiously, then jumped onto the couch and sat down on Taylor’s lap.

“Awww” Selena’s voice could be heard.

“She wants to hang out with you too!” Taylor cooed and scratched the cat behind her ears.

“I miss her, too” Selena said. “But don’t distract me from your pregnancy announcement!”

Taylor rolled her eyes.

“I’m not pregnant. Anyways. I want to come out to my fans.”

Selena’s eyes went wide, and she leaned in closer to the camera as if she hadn’t heard correctly. When she didn’t say anything, Taylor continued.

“I’ve been planning a listening party with some fans at my house in Rhode Island. I want to play some songs from Rep for them and talk about coming out and stuff. They’re all gay fans or allies, obviously, not some of the … whatever. Karlie is gonna be there, too. The twins too. My family.”

She took a deep breath, then added: “I was hoping you would come too?”

Selena looked stunned.

“Wow, Taylor. That’s a lot of information you just dropped on me.”

Taylor felt her chest tighten. Was her best friend not okay with her plans?

“Of course I will be there! When is it? Actually, I don’t care when it is, I’ll clear my schedule. I want to support you, of course Taylor” Selena started rambling, and Taylor relaxed.

“I have a million questions right now. Is Tree okay with this? Karlie? Everyone else? Oh God, how will you go about this? How will the fans react? They love Reputation obviously, but … oh wow.”

Taylor smiled at her friend, who was barely catching her breath.

“Thank you, Sel. It means a lot. I will catch you up on everything” she promised.

“It will be the weekend after my birthday. Sorry for the short notice. I have a final meeting with Tree tomorrow about it, and then we’ll send the invitations to the fans that I’ve picked.” She couldn’t hide the fact that she was nervous too, now that it was all coming together.

“I’ll be there. Wow. It’s gonna be one hell of a party” Selena grinned. “And I can’t wait to see Karlie again, too. Haven’t seen her since when? Your 4th of July party? God that feels like forever ago.” She shook her head.

“I’m gonna support you, no matter what, Tay. I’ll be there.”

The two friends smiled at each other.

They talked about Taylor’s plans until the early hours of the morning.

 

***

 

Karlie and Kariann were laughing about a stupid joke Kimby had made when the elevator reached their floor and the door opened. They went out and rang the doorbell to Taylor’s apartment.

Karlie’s laughter died in her throat when instead of the blonde singer, a tall red-headed woman opened the door.

“Tree!?”

The twins went silent as well and looked at the woman in bewilderment.

_Tree? Her publicist?_

_I think so?_

 “Good morning Karlie. Good morning, girls. Come in.” Tree did not look fazed by the sisters’ appearance in the slightest.

 _Is she expecting us?_ Karlie asked Kariann through her thoughts.

Kariann shrugged and gave Karlie an apologetic look.

“Um … we’re actually here for breakfast with Taylor” Karlie said as they went inside.

“So am I.”

Tree still didn’t look surprised in the slightest.

When she received three questioning looks, however, the proverbial penny dropped.

“Wait … Taylor didn’t tell you I was here?”

Before they could answer, they heard someone clearing their throat. All four women simultaneously turned around and saw Taylor enter the lobby.

“Good mor-“ Taylor said cheerfully but went silent when she felt Karlie’s eyes shoot daggers into her.

“Um … yeah Tree’s here, too. We have a lot to talk about” she made a vague gesture and grinned in an attempt to break the tension.

The twins shifted uncomfortably.

_What’s going on?_

_I don’t know. Looks like Taylor set this up so Karlie has to face Tree … I can’t hear Taylor’s thoughts but Tree is confused because she thought we knew about this. Also Karlie’s mad._

Kimby groaned audibly in response.

_I just wanted some of Taylor’s blueberry pancakes._

“Why don’t we all sit down in the dining room? I set the table, and the pancakes are ready.” Taylor said.

Kimby and Kariann took that as a cue and rushed past Tree and Karlie towards Taylor and the pancakes. Taylor grinned at them.

Karlie and Tree still stood there, dumbfounded.

“Taylor” Karlie hissed.

Taylor took a few steps from where she had been standing towards the two other women, not meeting their eyes.

“Do you think this is funny? You should have told me. Why didn’t you tell me we were having a meeting with Tree?”

Taylor looked up to Karlie and crossed her arms in front of herself. When she spoke, her voice was quiet.

“Because I didn’t want you to avoid her again like the last time she was over. What we need to talk about is important, and we don’t have much time. I’m sorry, Karlie. Please don’t be mad.”

Karlie took a deep breath. She didn’t want to lose it in front of Taylor’s publicist.

“I … I don’t know what to say. You should have told me. I wasn’t prepared for this.”

Before Taylor could reply, Tree chimed in.

“Why don’t we all sit down and talk over breakfast. I’m sorry she didn’t tell you, Karlie, I thought you knew” she gave Taylor a pointed look.

Taylor ducked.

“And I’m not sure why your sisters have to be there for the meeting, either. But let’s just sit down.” With that, she started calmly walking towards the dining room. The twins’ chatter could be heard from it.

Karlie followed Tree, and when she reached Taylor, she gave her a sad look, then pulled her into a tight embrace.

“Good morning, babe” she whispered and kissed her head.

Taylor sighed deeply in relief that Karlie wasn’t avoiding her. Essentially, that had never been their way of going about things. Even when they were mad at each other, they wouldn’t yell or slam the door. Even during their strongest disagreements, they still showed affection towards each other.

Taylor hugged her back just as tightly, and they stood there for a few moments, thankful that the others were already in the next room. When they separated, Karlie still had that disappointed look in her eyes, and Taylor knew she would have a lot of convincing to do that this had been the best way to handle it. Even though she wasn’t so sure about it anymore.

The twins and Tree were making small talk. Taylor realized that they had never actually met before. _Way to go,_ she thought. _This is gonna be an interesting morning._

Karlie unpacked the fruit salad she had prepared, and Taylor went to get the pancakes from the kitchen. Olivia had made her way into the dining room, curious about the visitors. Kariann and Kimby picked her up excitedly, showering her with love and affection.

Tree watched them and smiled.

Karlie in turn watched Tree watching the twins and couldn’t help but giggle, causing Tree to turn her head towards her.

“What’s so funny?” the red-head inquired, the smile still on her lips.

Karlie blushed. “Oh … ugh … I’ve just never seen you smile before” she said lamely.

Tree burst out laughing. “Well, you can’t see me smile if you never spend any time with me, Karlie.”

Karlie ducked her head, blushing even more.

“Maybe it’s good that Taylor did this, you know. I feel like we need to get to know each other better if we want to work together, not just through Taylor” the publicist added more seriously.

“I’m not just her scary publicist who denies rumors about her love life. I’m also her friend. And I would love to hear your side of the story from you so I can make decisions that are in all our best interest.”

Karlie felt caught, like Tree could see right through her.

“Yeah .. you’re right. I’m sorry. I will cooperate” she said shyly.

“And sorry about my behavior the last time you were here …”

A week earlier, after Karlie had cooked lunch for Taylor and herself, Tree had visited briefly to talk to Taylor. Karlie had fleetingly said hello, then retreated to the bedroom upstairs, not wanting to talk to the publicist. She hadn’t wanted to think about Taylor’s coming out plans, or her listening party, or anything. Especially not in Tree’s presence. She hadn’t even told her goodbye when she left, and then not asked Taylor what they had talked about.

“It’s okay, I forgive you, Karlie. Let’s just make the best of today.”

Tree stood up and reached out her hand to Karlie, who awkwardly shook it. This felt a little too formal for her liking.

Just then, Taylor walked in. She looked around at the scene before her. She wanted to make a snarky comment, but decided against it. Tree and Karlie talking to each other when she wasn’t around? The twins almost squeezing her cat to death with their love? Worse things had happened to her.

She pretended she hadn’t noticed anything and placed the plate of pancakes on the table, then reached for the coffee pot. She let out an exaggerated yawn.

“God, I’m so tired. I haven’t slept much at all.”

The twins briefly looked at her, then directed their attention back towards Olivia. Meredith decided to make an entrance at this moment, and the twins cooed at her to come closer. The grey cat, however, kept her distance and scowled at them.

Karlie and Tree looked at Taylor.

“Why didn’t you sleep?” Karlie asked, a hint of concern in her voice.

“Oh, I was just on the phone with Selena until like 2AM, then fell asleep on the couch, woke up there around 5AM with Olivia sleeping on my chest, and then went to sleep, and now here I am” Taylor dramatically recounted the events from last night.

Karlie rolled her eyes in response. Tree simply watched them, but another smile crept onto her face.

When she had started working for Taylor, the singer had just gone through a break-up and her image in the media was the worst it had ever been. Tree knew she had helped the singer regain her positive image, but she also knew that Taylor’s real happiness had come from Karlie, who had just so happened to stumble into her life that year. Flash forward to the present day, and Taylor’s image – her Reputation – had been suffering again, but she was at peace with it. Tree was proud of how far her client had become – not only because it made her work easier, too, but also because Taylor had become a friend. It was only natural that she wanted to be friendly with Karlie as well.

Taylor downed the cup of coffee like it was Gatorade and set it on the table with a loud clunk. Then she rubbed her eyes and finally sat down.

Seeing the pancakes on the table, the twins finally diverted their attention away from the cats and started taking multiple pancakes each.

Karlie watched them in horror.

_Who raised you!?_

Kariann, however, didn’t even flinch and simply grinned at her older sister mischievously.

 _I swear, you turn into Kimby more and more each day_ , Karlie scolded her.

Kariann looked offended for a second, then turned towards Taylor.

“Thank you, Taylor, these pancakes are amazing” she said sweetly, albeit with her mouth full. Kimby nodded along enthusiastically.

Karlie put her hands over her face in embarrassment.

“I’m glad you like them” Taylor simply replied, too used to the twins’ shenanigans.

“Please, help yourself” she said towards Tree in a politer way.

Tree followed suit and put a reasonable amount of pancakes and fruit salad on her plate, and Taylor handed her the coffee pot.

“Thank you for breakfast, babe” Karlie said and gave Taylor a quick peck on the lips.

“You’re welcome” Taylor replied and scooted closer to Karlie so that their legs were touching. She couldn’t be in the presence of her girlfriend without her comforting touch.

They all started eating, and it was quiet for a while.

When Taylor finished her plate, she cleared her throat awkwardly.

“So …” she started, and immediately all the attention was on her.

“First off, sorry that I didn’t tell you guys Tree was coming over. I just …” she didn’t know how to finish her sentence. _I just didn’t want Karlie to bail again_ sounded a bit harsh.

“No, actually, it was a smart idea” Karlie said.

Taylor looked at her in surprise.

“I apologized to Tree earlier about my behavior from the last time.” She could feel the twins’ confused looks on her, and quickly sheltered her thoughts. They didn’t need to know everything.

“But she’s right, I will make more of an effort. I can’t promise I will comply with everything she wants, though … but I’m here to talk, I’m not running away” she bit her lip and looked at Taylor carefully.

“Thank you” Taylor said and squeezed Karlie’s arm. Tree nodded in agreement.

Taylor took a deep breath.

“So.”

She looked at the others.

“I came up with a name for the listening party. It’s gonna be called the Secret Sessions.”

Tree and Karlie smiled at that, but the twins’ eyes went wide.

“Listening party? What are we missing here?” Kimby asked.

Taylor laughed.

“That’s why you two are here today. I’ve been planning it for a while now. You know how I want to come out to my fans, and I want to invite a few of them to my house in Rhode Island. I’m gonna play some songs for them, and we’ll just talk about stuff …”

There was a stunned silence at the other end of the table.

“Wow” Kimby said.

“That’s like, a really huge deal” Kariann added.

“Yeah” Taylor said, feeling shy suddenly.

“It’s awesome, though! Like, I’m here for it!” Kimby said encouragingly and smiled at Taylor.

“Are we invited?”

Taylor laughed. “Of course. That’s why I’m telling you now.”

Kimby did a fist pump in the air. “Yes!”

“How did you pick out the fans?” Kariann asked.

Tree couldn’t help but chuckle at the question.

“She stalks them online” she chimed in before Taylor had a chance to answer.

“I don’t stalk them” Taylor said lamely in an attempt to defend herself. “I’m just interested in their lives.”

“Oh my God” Kimby giggled, then her eyes went wide again as if she had just had an idea.

“Wait! Oh my God! Can we invite Kelley? You remember her, right?” she asked and jumped up and down in her chair in excitement.

Karlie took another sip of her coffee, watching the conversation in amusement.

“Yes, I actually wanted to ask you guys about her contact information” Taylor grinned. Of course she remembered their friend from college.

“Wait you’re sending out the invitations yourself? She’s not gonna make it. She’s gonna die” Kimby said dramatically.

Tree laughed. She nudged Karlie’s arm. “I like these two.”

Karlie blushed. It was funny to her that the twins probably already knew more about Tree than the publicist could imagine. Nevertheless, she was thankful that the publicist seemed to enjoy their albeit overwhelming presence.

“Yeah, I’m sending out the invitations myself, via e-mail. We’re actually gonna send them tonight. I have every fan’s e-mail except for Kelley’s” Taylor stated.

“How many people are coming? Who are these people?” Kariann asked curiously and reached across the table for a piece of toast.

“Oh, around twenty people. And they’re all long-time fans who have never met me before. And yeah, most of them are gay or bi themselves, and if not they’ve all expressed their support of LGBT rights. I wanted it to be a safe space, and to talk to them about my coming out. I thought it would be nice for them to know I’m with them.”

Kimby stared at the singer for a long second. Sometimes she forgot that Taylor, Karlie’s girlfriend, was also Taylor Swift, the pop star. She hadn’t felt star-struck in her presence in a long time, but right now she did.

“Wow” she said quietly. “That’s going to have such a big influence on their lives, knowing about your sexuality. This is gonna be a huge deal.”

Taylor simply smiled softly at her.

“Thank you for letting us be a part of it” Kariann added, doing her best to not become too sappy.

“What about Karlie, though? Will she be introduced as your girlfriend?” Kimby asked.

Karlie flinched a little at the question.

“Which brings us to our next big point of discussion” Tree said and folded her hands on the table.

Taylor and Karlie both exhaled audibly at the same time. Taylor looked at Karlie expectantly.

“I … “ Karlie started but felt uncomfortable with all the attention suddenly on her.

Taylor reached out and put her hand on her arm. Karlie appreciated the gesture.

“I’ve been doing some thinking. I think … I don’t want to be presented to a room of twenty people.”

Taylor took in a sharp breath, and felt her heart beating in her chest. She didn’t know what she wanted Karlie to say.

“But …” Karlie smiled sadly. “But I also don’t want to hide from these people what is important to Taylor. So, I thought that we don’t have to explicitly introduce me, but we can just act normally around them at the party, and if they ask if I’m your girlfriend, you can just confirm it.”

Karlie rubbed her sweaty palms on her jeans, then looked at Taylor. The singer smiled at her, relieved.

“Thank you, Karlie. I’m happy you’ve made up your mind. That’s how we’ll do it.” She leaned in to give Karlie a kiss. Karlie in turn wished that they were alone, because she felt like she needed Taylor’s comfort and reassurance. Nevertheless, she was glad that Taylor accepted her plan. Just thinking about all the possible scenarios at the party made her nervous.

Taylor felt the same, and when neither of them pulled away from the kiss, Tree awkwardly cleared her throat. The couple separated reluctantly.

“Thank you, Karlie. I’m okay with that plan, too. You can’t plan things like that a hundred percent, anyways.”

Taylor gave her publicist a death stare for that comment that said _why would you say that!?_

Tree rubbed her temples, but said nothing.

Kariann spoke up carefully.

“I think it’s a good way to handle it, too. And we’ll be there, too, Karlie. It will be fine.”

 _Thank you_ , Taylor thought in Kariann’s direction, causing the younger girl to smile.

“Yeah, I hope so” was all Karlie had to add.

There was another short silence, in which the five women were all deep in thought.

“Taylor, one more thing …” Tree added. “The fans will also sign NDAs. I know it’s ironic because you want to come out, but it’s for the best.”

Taylor knew the topic would be brought up, but she still stiffened at the mention of NDAs.

“I know” she said defeated. Her hand was still on Karlie’s arm, and now she was nervously fiddling with Karlie’s sweatshirt.

“The fans will not be allowed to talk about anything that happened at the Secret Session to anyone who didn’t attend. We need to be careful. They can’t out you, you’re not ready yet. I know you picked them carefully, but we can never be too careful.”

“Yeah” Taylor simply agreed.

“I have already prepared the contracts, we will have them sign them immediately after they accept the invitation” Tree said matter-of-factly.

Kimby simply watched the exchange with her mouth open.

_Wow, there’s so much more to it than you would think. This is a huge deal._

_Yeah. I really don’t wanna be in Taylor’s shoes. She has to plan everything so carefully all the time …_ Kariann agreed.

Tree looked like she wanted to add something, but just then her phone started ringing. Everyone in the room startled, and Tree quickly grabbed her phone to accept the call and went into the next room.

The other four simply looked at each other, not saying anything. Taylor didn’t want any tension to evolve, so she got up to make more coffee.

“Does anyone want anything else?”

“More pancakes!” Kimby said with such determination in her voice that the others burst out laughing. Karlie got up to bring the empty bowl of fruit salad into the kitchen.

The twins started looking around for the cats. Olivia was wandering around under the table, exploring. Meredith was still sitting in the corner, unbothered. Kariann picked up Olivia, who meowed loudly.

Tree came back into the room at the same time as Taylor and Karlie did. Taylor was carrying a fresh stack of pancakes. Tree looked at her in confusion, wondering when Taylor had made those – she had only been gone for a few minutes. The twins, however, smirked at her knowingly.

“Taylor, sorry for the interruption. It was another client of mine who I’m meeting later” Tree explained.

“No worries” Taylor replied.

The twins excitedly started digging into the fresh pancakes and exaggeratedly praised Taylor’s baking skills.

Taylor rolled her eyes at them, and Karlie giggled.

They went on to other topics to talk about until Tree had to leave. She wished the twins well and even hugged Karlie goodbye. Taylor felt relieved that her girlfriend and her publicist finally seemed to be getting along better.

Taylor and the Kloss sisters leisurely finished breakfast and washed the dishes.

They were hanging out in the living room, deciding what to do for the rest of the day.

“I have plans tonight, but I’m free until like 5” Kariann offered.

Kimby grinned. “I’m free all day, but I’m gonna head home when Kari does.”

“Thank you” Karlie said very pointedly. Taylor laughed at the sisters’ banter.

Kimby decided to bring up the topic that she had wanted to talk about all morning.

“Taylor, I love Reputation so much! It’s such a good album!”

Taylor smiled. “Thank you for saying that.”

“Even though it’s about Karlie and that’s super weird for me to listen to” Kimby added and smirked.

Taylor felt her ears become hot. She knew the twins would tease her about it.

 _I’m warning you,_ Karlie thought towards the twins.

“Oh, don’t worry” Kariann said out loud.

“We have so many questions about the lyrics, but we won’t ask them” Kimby added, and gave her twin a high-five.

Karlie exhaled loudly.

_You two are insufferable._

Taylor, on the other hand, looked the twins dead in the eyes.

“There will be no further explanation.”

Her serious face combined with the dry delivery caused the others to burst out laughing. When the laughter died down, Karlie tried to change the subject again.

“Ok guys, but seriously, what are we doing today? I don’t wanna stay in all day.”

“ _You_ want to leave the house?” Kimby asked with a furrowed brow.

Karlie stuck out her tongue in mock-offense. “Shut up, Kimby. I’m not a couch potato!”

“No, but you’ve been no fun to hang out with either” Kimby retorted.

Taylor knew it was all in good fun, but she didn’t want it to turn sour. She gave Kimby a pointed look to get her to stop. It was occasions like these when she wished she had Beverly’s skill levels and could just mute someone.

Karlie sat there with her arms crossed, and Taylor quickly chimed in.

“Why don’t we go to Central Park for a walk? Walk off the pancakes.”

Kariann laughed. “I think that’s a great idea. The weather hasn’t been this nice in a while. But is this okay for you, Taylor?”

Taylor knew what the girl meant. “Yeah. I mean, one of my security guards will come with us. I know I just released an album and we all remember what happened after the release of 1989-“

Karlie groaned at the memory.

“Yeah. But it will be okay. I don’t really care anymore.” Taylor shrugged.

They followed through with their plan. Taylor’s security drove them, and they spent a relatively normal day at the park. Taylor was stopped by fans a couple of times, but nothing crazy happened. After their walk they went for coffee until the twins went home, and Taylor and Karlie went back towards Taylor’s place.

“Oh wait! I forgot!” Taylor exclaimed just as the two of them had settled on the couch with a glass of wine.

Karlie looked at Taylor with narrowed eyes. “What?”

Taylor laughed and slapped her hand against her forehead.

“The twins. I forgot to tell them something.”

She looked lost in thought for a second, then looked at Karlie with wide eyes. “Now that I think about it, I haven’t told you yet, either!”

Karlie shifted her weight anxiously. “Would you please just tell me what you’re talking about?”

“I’m gonna have another party the weekend of the Secret Session. I just couldn’t mention it in front of Tree, because she can’t know about it. I invited Bev, Mike and some others from the CA. Let’s see it as a little birthday party slash coming out party slash I just wanna see them again party …” Taylor rambled on. Karlie could hardly keep up.

“So yeah, I was gonna tell the twins because obviously they are invited too, and you too … but I forgot” she added and laughed.

Karlie definitely hadn’t expected Taylor to be up to even more than she was already up to – but at this point, who could even tell. She simply expressed her agreement and anticipation.

Taylor reached for her phone on the couch table to text the twins, and the two of them talked about what a big weekend it would be for Taylor.

After a while Kimby sent a voice message, screaming something incoherent, but definitely supportive.

Karlie laughed.

“I know everyone is going to have so much fun, and it’s going to be an amazing time!”

Taylor realized once more how much Karlie’s younger sisters had started feeling like family to her as well. She was close to her brother, but there was a special bond between the sisters she hadn’t had growing up.

When she told Karlie as much, she was rewarded with the softest, yet most passionate kiss they had shared in a while.

 


	8. Eight

Taylor woke up from Karlie’s alarm shrilling through the bedroom. She turned around, shoving her face back into the pillow. She felt way too tired to open her eyes.

_Five more minutes._

She felt Karlie getting up and moving around the room.

_Wait._

Karlie made her way to Taylor’s side of the bed.

_It’s my birthday. Why did the alarm clock go off?_

“Happy birthday!” Karlie exclaimed and shook Taylor’s shoulder.

Taylor groaned in response and lazily opened one eye. Even in her sleepy daze she noticed that there was no light shining through the curtains. It was still pitch dark outside.

“Karlie!” she groaned again and opened her eyes completely. Her girlfriend was standing next to her, towering over the bed and grinning.

“What time is it? It’s my birthday!”

“Exactly! It’s birthday surprise time!”

Taylor closed her eyes again.

“It’s the middle of the night, isn’t it?”

“Nope! It’s 5:30!”

“Five Thirty!? Karlie! No. I’m going back to sleep. How can you even think clearly at this time of day?”

“Taylor!” Karlie whined and nudged her shoulder again.

“I have a surprise for you! You won’t regret it!”

She leaned down to pull the blanket away.

“Stop doing that! That’s what my mom used to do every morning before school. God.” Taylor said, trying her best to be annoyed with her girlfriend. She couldn’t help but giggle.

Karlie laughed. “You’ve never been a morning person.” She leaned down further and held the blanket in place, then gave Taylor a quick kiss.

“Good morning, birthday girl. Let’s get ready quickly. We’ve got places to be.”

Taylor simply hummed in response. She felt her heart flutter at Karlie’s touch. She was tired and grumpy about it, but she was excited to see what Karlie had planned.

“Good morning.” It came out as a whisper. She quickly kissed Karlie back, then let herself be pulled up.

They got dressed and brushed their teeth.

“Should I feed the cats already?” Taylor wondered out loud.

“No, they will be fine. We won’t be away for that long.”

Taylor raised an eyebrow, wanting Karlie to elaborate. The taller girl still hadn’t said a word about where they were going or what they were doing. Karlie simply grinned and made her way over to a small cabinet in the corner of the room.

She looked through the drawers for a specific shirt. The cabinet contained mostly her clothes. She suddenly realized how much of her stuff was permanently at Taylor’s house. She pulled out an old St Louis Cardinal’s jersey. _Really? How did that get here?_

Taylor was still watching her with a raised eyebrow. “I’m all done, Karlie. Only waiting for you.”

A moment later Karlie triumphantly held up what she had been looking for.

“Your NASA sweater? Why do you need to wear that one right now?” Taylor asked.

Karlie quickly put it on. “Oh, no reason!”

She made her way to Taylor and grabbed her hand. “Let’s go!”

 

***

 

“Central Park?” Taylor asked incredulously when her security dropped them off. She looked at Karlie with narrowed eyes.

“No! I mean yeah, but no” Karlie exclaimed and grinned. She quickly got out of the car to open the door for Taylor on the other side.

“See you later, Miss Swift, Miss Kloss. Have fun!” The security guard nodded and drove off.

“But …” Taylor looked after the black SUV as if they had been dropped off in the middle of nowhere, not the middle of New York City.

“Let’s go!” Karlie took Taylor’s hand and led her along the sidewalk. It was still dark. The sidewalk was dimly lit by the streetlights, and there were no other people around except for the occasional car passing by. The air was cold, and she could see her breath. Taylor felt nervous, but she trusted Karlie.

Her eyes went wide when they turned around the corner and the planetarium came into view. Karlie grinned widely. She was still holding Taylor’s hand and turned around to face her.

“This is it!”

“What are we doing here?” Taylor asked, looking around in confusion. “It looks closed.”

“Duh!” Karlie grinned again. Then her expression turned a little more serious. “So … I need to ask you to do something.” She tilted her head and Taylor could see a mischievous glint in her eyes.

“I’m not gonna strip down naked” Taylor deadpanned.

Karlie snorted. “No. Oh God. I need you to become invisible for a few minutes, so we can get in.”

Taylor looked at her like she had lost her mind. “And how are _you_ gonna get in?”

“That’s not the problem.” Karlie didn’t elaborate.

Taylor sighed, then closed her eyes. She let go of Karlie’s hand, not wanting to accidentally turn her invisible as well. It was a skill she was working on still.

She focused all her energy on her wish to follow through with whatever Karlie had planned. Her breathing was even, and she put her arms around herself.

When she heard Karlie gasp, she opened her eyes again.

“It worked” Karlie said, sounding out of breath. It wasn’t like she had never seen Taylor do this. It was just that she would never get used to it.

Taylor breathed out as well. “Good.” She took Karlie’s hand again. The taller girl startled a little, and Taylor laughed at her reaction.

“Sorry” Karlie whispered and tightened her grip on Taylor’s hand. The singer let herself be led around the building. They stopped in front of a door that said _Employees Only_.

“Karlie” she whispered. “You don’t work here.”

Karlie only rolled her eyes and grinned. She pulled out her phone. She let it ring once, then hung up again. Not even a minute later, a woman opened the door.

“You’re Karlie?” The woman asked in a friendly voice. She was about as tall as Taylor and had brown curly hair. Taylor noticed how tired she looked and hoped that she wasn’t here this early just because of whatever it was that Karlie had planned.

“Yes. Nice to meet you, Alysha” Karlie replied and shook the woman’s hand.

Alysha let them in and Taylor hurried past Karlie before she shut the door in her face. _So she’s not a conjurer,_ she thought. _Then she could either see my outlines or there would be no need to sneak around._ Taylor nevertheless sheltered her thoughts, just in case. _Can conjurers hear the thoughts of invisible people?_ She made a mental note to ask Kariann.

She trailed behind the two women, trying to listen to their conversation. They reached the foyer. It was a spacious room, with the reception near the main entrance, and a gift shop and a small cafeteria in the back. Posters advertising upcoming events were hanging on the walls. The lights were still switched off, but there was enough light coming in from the street lamps in front of the building.

“So, Clark didn’t really say why you wanted to be here today, specifically, and this early …” Alysha said and looked at Karlie with a questioning look.

Karlie grinned. “Yeah … Did he give you the last batch of cookies?” She didn’t elaborate this time, either.

“He did. They’re really good!” Alysha laughed. “Can’t wait for your next batch!”

“I will give them to him Monday.”

Taylor was now utterly confused. _Clark? Karlie’s colleague? Cookies?_

“Can’t wait!”

“Are you usually here this early?” Karlie asked.

Alysha shook her head. “No. We only open at 8 for school classes. But it’s okay. I’m gonna organize the office while you’re in there, haven’t done that in a while. And I have my coffee.”

“Thank you for doing this. It really means a lot to me.” Karlie smiled genuinely.

“It’s no big deal. It’s something different, you know? And my brother asked nicely enough, and your cookies are payment enough too.” Alysha laughed.

Taylor stopped in her tracks. _Karlie is paying Alysha in cookies? She’s gonna have so much explaining to do._

The other two women stopped walking and Taylor almost bumped into Alysha. Alysha looked in Taylor’s direction with a confused look. Karlie noticed and did her best to appear nonchalant.

“Something wrong?”

“Oh, no. I thought someone else was standing next to me right now, but it must’ve been you.” Alysha laughed uncomfortably.

“Anyways. Here’s the planetarium. I prepared the room the way you asked to. You’re okay with being alone in there, right?”

They walked through a door and entered the round room.

Karlie just nodded. “Thank you. It’s perfect! Thank you for your help” she smiled.

“You’re welcome. I’ll go to the office then, and the show should start in about five minutes.”

Karlie thanked her again, and Alysha walked out and closed the door. When Taylor was sure she was gone, she focused her energy on becoming visible again.

Karlie smiled when Taylor slowly started appearing in front of her. She took a step forward and kissed her.

“What the hell is going on Karlie” Taylor whispered when they separated.

Karlie grinned, looking proud of herself.

“You think you’re the only one with connections everywhere?” she stuck out her tongue. Taylor rolled her eyes.

“It’s my birthday surprise for you!”

“Your colleague’s sister? And you’re paying her in cookies? How long have you been planning this? How did this even work?”

Karlie’s grin grew even wider. “Have to give her cookies every week until Christmas. And I can’t tell you more.”

“Since when do you even get along with Clark? I thought you didn’t even like any of your colleagues?”

“Enough questions, Taylor! The show is about to start!” Karlie laughed and walked towards the middle of the room between the rows of seats. A large projector was standing in the middle, but there was room around it. On one side there was an air mattress with blankets and pillows.

“It’s perfect! Let’s lay down!”

Taylor didn’t know what else to do so she followed suit. Once they were laying down and had pulled the blankets around them, Karlie grabbed Taylor’s hand. She said nothing and simply looked at the ceiling in excitement.

“Karlie?” Taylor asked nervously.

“What?”

“What if there’s cameras in here? And Alysha can see from her office that I’m in here with you?”

Karlie didn’t reply right away. She looked around the room.

“I didn’t think about that.”

Taylor groaned. “Maybe I should stay invisible.”

“It’s gonna be fine, Taylor. And no, I wanna see your face. If she sees you, I’ll just bribe her with more cookies. Or do Clark’s work for another month-“

“Karlie!“

Karlie simply laughed and turned her head to Taylor. Their faces were close, and they looked at each other for a moment.

“Relax!”

Taylor gulped. “I’ll try.”

Before Karlie could add something, the show started playing on the wide, round screen that spread over the ceiling.

 

***

 

“Look up!” Karlie whispered.

Their shoulders brushed. The galaxy opened up above them. Taylor and Karlie looked at the scene in awe. Countless stars appeared on the screen, illuminating the room.

“The night sky … beautiful, mysterious, enchanting.”

Taylor felt a million emotions all at once, and every single star in the sky was symbolizing them. Yet, it all felt so simple.

The narration continued. It explained the way humans had interpreted the night sky, the stars, the moon, since ancient times. The mysteries and the revelations it bore. The voice was relaxing, yet intriguing.

In between, there were images of the galaxy as if they were floating through space.

Taylor looked over at Karlie and grinned. Her girlfriend’s eyes were focused on the screen. She reached out for her hand and took it.

“This is such a cool present, Karlie. Thank you.”

Karlie turned her head towards Taylor and smiled. “I’m glad you’re enjoying it.”

“It’s both nerdy and romantic. A perfect combination for us.” Taylor said and chuckled lightly.

“That’s what I was going for!”

Karlie grinned her wide signature smile. Taylor wished their faces were even closer, close enough to kiss. She scooted towards Karlie. Karlie let go of her hand and instead scooted closer as well, turning so she was cuddling Taylor. She put her arm around her waist, then looked up again as the narration resumed.

“I was gonna give you a kiss” Taylor pouted. She readjusted so she could put her arm around Karlie as well.

“Sorry” Karlie laughed and faced Taylor again. She gave her a quick peck on the lips, then looked back at the screen.

“I don’t wanna miss this.” Her voice was hushed, as if they weren’t the only people in the room.

Taylor chuckled again.

“Whatever. Nerd.”

“Shut up.”

The images on the screen went from a spacecraft circling the earth to the sun. The narrator explained how humans had gone from being the center of the world to gradually understanding the role of the sun in relation to the earth.  The surface of the sun looked marvelous, and even more so up-close.

Taylor tore her eyes away from the screen again to look at Karlie. She admired the features of her face and the freckles on her cheek. She admired the attentiveness in her eyes and the definition of her cheekbones in the dimly lit room.

“I love you.”

The utterance caused Karlie to tear her eyes away from the film again and look at Taylor. Taylor couldn’t quite place the look in her eyes. They still held the same attentiveness as before, in the same way she always looked at her. But there was also a certain glint in them.

Karlie looked like she wanted to make a teasing remark, but then decided against it and paused.

“You’re my best friend.”

Taylor heard nothing but the quick-paced drum of her own heartbeat in her ears. The room may as well have been silent. She leaned in again, and this time the kiss was longer. It was soft and sweet. Karlie brought her hand up to gently caress Taylor’s cheek. Taylor never wanted it to end. They had exchanged _I love you_ s before. They had kissed under the stars before. Maybe it was because it was her birthday, or maybe it was because of everything else that was going on in their lives at the moment that this felt so very special. All she knew was that she would never get tired of it.

When they separated and looked up again, the background music had changed to a gently flowing piano piece, and the film showed northern lights. Taylor had no idea how much of the film they had missed, but she didn’t care. She admired the snowy landscapes, the tall trees and the purple, pink and green lights above them. She was reminded of the recent night she and Karlie had talked watching the sunset.

“It’s so beautiful.”

She rested her head on Karlie’s chest, who pulled her close once more. It took a few moments of readjusting to find a comfortable position in which both could see the film properly. They giggled.

“Thank you, Karlie, this was such a sweet idea” Taylor whispered.

Karlie simply hummed in response, then placed a kiss on Taylor’s head. Taylor didn’t have to look up to know that Karlie was already engrossed in the narration again.

She shifted her attention towards the film again. A new segment had just begun, and the galaxy was being shown once more. The narrator explained different kinds of stellar clusters. The images showed the vastness of space. Taylor listened carefully – she nevertheless hoped Karlie didn’t expect her to discuss the topics later.

A few minutes later the narrator concluded the film. The background music was fast-paced again, and the earth was shown from above. Taylor and Karlie kept lying there for a while longer. Then they suddenly remembered that Alysha could open the door any second, and that Taylor had to become invisible again before they could leave.

Sighing, they forced themselves to return to the here and now.


	9. Nine

 

They stepped outside and inhaled the fresh morning air. The sun was just about to rise, a faint purple line was visible between the high buildings of Manhattan.

Taylor allowed herself to become visible again. She rubbed her temple.

“Are you okay?” Karlie asked and put a strand of hair out of Taylor’s face. She felt relieved everything had gone according to plan.

“Yeah, just a bit of a headache from the effort” Taylor said and shrugged.

“It will go away, it’s not a big deal.”

Karlie chastely kissed Taylor’s forehead, then turned around to walk, pulling the singer with her. Taylor felt on high alert from the display of affection but told herself to calm down. There was no one around. She walked with Karlie.

“Are we being picked up somewhere or do we have to walk home?” she asked drily after a few minutes.

Karlie laughed. “Relax, Taylor. We can call security anytime. I just wanted to enjoy a nice morning walk and go to a bakery. I’ll make breakfast when we get home.”

“Okay, I didn’t say anything, then. Don’t wanna mess with your plans for me today.” Taylor chuckled.

Karlie turned towards her and grinned at her, and Taylor did the same. She wished she could hold her hand right now. But it would be too risky. They were walking along the street next to Central Park. The city was waking up more and more with each step they were taking. The traffic had increased considerably. Nevertheless, people did not seem to stop and pay attention to them. Everyone was hurrying along in the cold of morning.

They stopped at an intersection and crossed the road. On the corner of a side street, there was a small French bakery. Karlie’s face lit up and they went inside. Taylor simply followed her. The store had just opened, and there was only one other customer inside. It was warm and smelled of freshly baked bread and ground coffee. Taylor felt herself relax, yet she didn’t turn her face towards the clerk behind the counter and instead looked at the sweet baked goods on display at the other end of the store.

“I would like two regular and two chocolate croissants, please.” She heard Karlie place her order.

When they exited the store, Karlie had a look on her face Taylor couldn’t quite place. The taller girl took her hand and squeezed it briefly, then let go again. They kept walking in silence.

“I’m gonna call your security guard to pick us up again” Karlie announced after a while. “Or do you want to keep walking?”

“No!” Taylor protested and they both laughed. Taylor realized how comfortable Karlie had gotten in her interactions with Taylor’s security team. She wasn’t sure if it was a good or a bad thing. Karlie made the call, and Taylor kept pondering about it. After Karlie hung up, she had concluded that it was a good thing. This was the reality of her life, after all. She couldn’t change it. So Karlie had adjusted to it.

“He’ll be here in about five minutes, I told him to meet us at the next intersection” Karlie interrupted her thoughts.

“Thank you” Taylor replied and looked up at Karlie. They smiled at each other.

Karlie stopped walking for a moment to touch Taylor’s shoulder. “Let’s get you home, hmm.”

All Taylor wanted was to lean in and kiss her, but she knew it would have to wait. She also knew the wait would be worth it. Karlie was worth the wait. If it meant she got to kiss Karlie as many times as she pleased later, she could always wait.

They made it to the intersection. At the corner on their side of the street there was a construction site that seemed to start operating for the day. They still had a few minutes until Taylor’s driver would be there, so Karlie pulled Taylor with her into the quieter side street. Next to the construction side, the shops were still closed. They decided to wait there.

They talked quietly. Taylor felt cold and put her scarf closer around her neck. Karlie instinctively stepped closer towards her to keep her warm but stopped herself at the last second before she would have put her arms around her. Taylor could see from Karlie’s expression how she was trying not to look too disappointed.

“He’ll be there any second now” Taylor said encouragingly. Karlie smiled sadly at her but nodded.

Suddenly something seemed to have caught Karlie’s eye, because her face lit up. Taylor narrowed her eyes, then turned around. “What is it, Karlie?”

“Nothing, just had an idea!” Karlie said and grinned. Just then her phone started ringing, announcing the arrival of their driver. Karlie wiped the call away. She then quickly looked around herself and proceeded to walk towards the construction site.

Taylor watched with her eyes wide as Karlie picked up a stick from the ground and wrote _KK_ _♡_ _TS_ into the fresh concrete.

Karlie spun around, grinning from ear to ear. She grabbed Taylor’s hand and pulled her with her towards the black SUV that was waiting for them at the corner.

By the time they were putting on their seatbelts and the car was driving off, they had both erupted in roaring laughter.

 

***

 

“Miss you, too. See you so soon!” Taylor said and ended the call.

She was sitting on a bar stool on the kitchen island while Karlie was preparing breakfast. As the morning had progressed, more and more calls and text messages from friends and family had been coming in. This was Taylor’s favorite part of having birthdays – hearing from people you don’t always get to talk to.

“I’m so glad I hired a catering service for tonight” she remarked as she watched Karlie open and close several cabinets to find ingredients.

“Yeah, me too” the taller girl chuckled. “Will they also take the dirty dishes with them?”

“Absolutely. I’ll have enough dishes to do on the weekend.”

Taylor’s friends and family would come over in the afternoon.

“I’m so happy Austin is making the trip to NYC today and then again to Rhode Island on the weekend. It’s crazy, but I love him for doing that for me” she added and smiled.

Karlie smiled back at her.

“Yeah, I can’t wait to see him too. And also A-“ her eyes went wide when she realized what she was about to say and she quickly turned around again, busying herself with the ingredients on the counter.

“What did you say?” Taylor asked confused.

“Nothing.”

Taylor’s high school friend Abigail was set to make a surprise visit later in the day. She would be unable to attend Taylor’s Secret Session on the weekend. Heartbroken for not being able to be there for her friend at such an important event, she and Karlie had planned the surprise visit. Karlie cursed under her breath, not wanting to ruin the surprise.

Taylor raised an eyebrow, but didn’t inquire any further. She got up and took a package of cat food out of the cabinet and went to pour it into a bowl. Hearing the familiar sound, Olivia came closer, purring loudly.

Just as Karlie was taking a carton of eggs out of the fridge, Meredith came dashing into the kitchen, making a bee line towards her bowl with no eyes for anything else. Unfortunately for Karlie, she was in the way of the hungry cat. She startled as Meredith ran closely past her and dropped the carton of eggs on the floor. Taylor watched it all happen as if in slow motion. The carton of eggs crashed to the floor and Karlie cursed again but loudly this time. Olivia startled too, but quickly returned to her breakfast. Meredith simply started eating and didn’t even turn around to look at the mess she had caused.

Taylor burst out laughing.

“Oh my god, Karlie. Are you okay?”

“This cat! I swear!”

Karlie looked down at her feet. The raw eggs were spilt on the ground and the counter, but nothing had gotten on her pants and socks.

She turned around towards Taylor. “Not funny!” When the singer laughed even more at her facial expression, she grinned. “Okay, maybe a little funny.”

She was careful not to step into the mess on the floor. “But now we won’t have omelets for breakfast!”

Taylor was about to get towels to clean up when she had a better idea. “Don’t worry. I’ll fix this.”

Karlie raised an eyebrow but didn’t say anything. She watched Taylor focus her eyes on the floor. The singer then pressed her eyes shut, looking deep in concentration. The spilt eggs disappeared.

“Wow.” Karlie said impressed.

“Pretty good, huh?” Taylor grinned.

Karlie leaned down to touch the floor. The next second she quickly pulled her hand away again, shrieking. “Taylor! It’s still there!”

Taylor’s eyes went wide. Karlie was holding a broken eggshell in her hand. The taller girl started giggling. “Oh my god, Taylor. You didn’t clean it up, you simply made it invisible!”

Taylor turned deep red as Karlie was laughing at her expense. “Oh my God. I cannot believe you. This is so funny. I’m so telling the twins later.” Karlie couldn’t stop laughing.

Mumbling something under her breath, Taylor went to get the towels to clean the floor. Karlie eventually helped her. She couldn’t help but comment how Taylor had made the clean-up more difficult. “It’s very hard to clean up egg yolk that you can’t actually see, you know. If I step into something later you’re gonna wash my socks for the rest of the year.”

“Shut up or I won’t conjure up any new eggs, Karlie. And then we won’t have omelets for breakfast.”

“We can always send someone from your team to the store. And we have croissants.”

“No, I want the omelets.”

They finished cleaning. Between giggles, Taylor managed to get them a new carton of eggs, and Karlie prepared the rest of the breakfast.

Meanwhile, Taylor answered more texts and calls. She didn’t tell anyone about the morning the two had spent at the planetarium, unsure of how to explain it. Karlie still refused to elaborate on how she had managed to organize it all. And Taylor simply enjoyed keeping the present her little secret.

They finally sat down for breakfast. Enjoying their coffee, croissants and omelets, they talked about Taylor’s small birthday party later that day, and then the two big parties on the weekend. Taylor didn’t even try to hide her nervousness.

“It will all be fine, Taylor.” Karlie reassured her for the umpteenth time. She didn’t care how often she had to say it. She could understand Taylor’s anxiety all too well, and she had hers as well. But she would nevertheless reassure the singer as many times as she needed.

“Maybe I shouldn’t have put both parties into the same weekend” Taylor pondered, but she knew she couldn’t change it anymore.

“We’ll have so much fun with everyone on Saturday. Bev will be there, Mr Edwards, the twins, your parents … and it’s not like you have to come out to them, Tay. They all know about us. It’s just a fun birthday party, a little get-together.”

“You’re right” Taylor said and exhaled audibly. She picked up the last croissant from the basket and put it on her plate.

“And I can’t wait to meet Mike’s daughter. So that’s gonna be fun” she grinned.

“There you go!” Karlie took another sip of her coffee.

“And on Sunday, everyone is going to be there, too. Your mom, me, the twins, Selena. Especially Selena is so excited for you. We all are. And your fans are so good, Taylor. But you know that. You wouldn’t have invited them to your house if you didn’t know that.”

They looked at each other and smiled. Karlie reached for Taylor’s hand across the table and squeezed it. She was glad they were at home and she didn’t have to worry about people looking at them.

“Thank you, Karlie. It will all be good. I know.”

The warm feeling of safety that came from being at home with Karlie put Taylor at ease.

They finished their breakfast.

“So, we still have a lot of time until anyone is coming over …” Karlie said.

Taylor took a step towards her girlfriend and put both hands on her waist. Then she leaned in for a kiss.

“I know … any idea what we could do?” She grinned.

Karlie ran her hands down Taylor’s back and under her shirt, then grinned back. “No, not at all.”


	10. Ten

 

Cora craned her neck to get a better look out of the car window as her dad slowed down the vehicle to pull into the long driveway. She gasped when she saw the mansion it belonged to. The enormous building had white walls, a black roof and she could make out three big chimneys, two of which were emitting smoke. Something told her she had seen this house before, but she couldn’t put her finger on it.

She was about to ask her dad for the millionth time that day where they were and what they were doing, but they were approached by a tall security guard with an iPad in his hands who was talking to someone via headphones.

“Good afternoon” the security guard greeted them in a friendly voice, and her dad returned the greeting.

“Welcome. May I have your names, please?”

“Michael and Cora Edwards” her dad replied.

Still not knowing where they were or why they needed to give their names, Cora just nodded along and smiled when the security guard looked at her.

“Ahh, yes, found your names” the man tapped the iPad a few times, then looked up at them again and stepped away from the car.

“Have a good time!” he said as he gave another security guard on the other side a thumbs up.

“Thank you!” her dad said cheerily and they drove into the parking lot in front of the house.

A couple of cars were already parked there. The snow that had fallen overnight was muddy on the concrete.

Mike parked the car and switched off the engine, then looked at his daughter with a wide smile.

“Are you excited?”

Cora rolled her eyes. She had no idea why her usually so well-composed and even strict father was behaving like a bubbly teenage girl since they had left the house.

“Dad, I’m happy you’re excited, but would you please tell me where we are or why we are here?” she groaned.

She had tracked their drive on Google Maps, so she knew they were in a small town in Rhode Island. They had driven for over three hours.

“You know what state you’re in, right?” her dad teased.

“Yes. A state of slight annoyance at you right now” Cora deadpanned.

Mike snort-laughed. He grinned at his daughter once more, then opened the car door and got out.

Cora threw her head back against the car seat and closed her eyes. What was this all about? Her dad had been behaving, well, very un-dad-like since he had announced to her the day before that she should ‘wear her best clothes tomorrow because we’re going to a special place’.

“But I have plans to go to the movies with my friends tomorrow night?” she had protested.

“Oh, well, cancel them. Trust me. You will thank me later, and your friends will understand” Mike had simply said.

So now here she was, wearing her new dress with a cardigan over it, shivering from the cold and anxious anticipation as she made her way around the muddy puddles in the parking lot to the front door.

She was on a lower step when her dad rang the doorbell, and she heard footsteps quickly approaching and muffled voices from inside.

The door opened and her jaw landed on the floor, and she had to hold on to the handrail in order to not stumble backwards.

“Hey Mike, good to see you again!” the tall, blonde woman said excitedly and hugged her dad, who returned the sentiment.

_Wait, what?_

Then she gestured to Cora to climb the last two steps and meet her at the threshold. The girl followed suit, almost like in trance, and then was wrapped into a tight hug.

“Hey Cora, I’m Taylor. I’m so happy you’re here. I’ve heard a lot about you!” the woman exclaimed.

Cora still stood there, unable to return the hug and still mute from shock.

Taylor and her dad laughed at her good-naturedly and ushered her inside.

“It seems like the surprise worked well” Taylor giggled. “Good job!”

Then she gave Mike a high-five.

_Wait, what?_

Cora snapped out of her trance and looked around herself. She was standing in a wide corridor that had a few doors leading to other rooms, and she could hear laughter from the next room. Then she looked the woman up and down.

_Yep, that’s Taylor Swift. Long blonde hair? Check. Perfect make-up? Check. Cute outfit? Check. Just hugged me tight and knew my name? Ugghhhh …. Check!?_

Taylor must have caught her staring, because she turned towards her and giggled.

“Yes, it’s me. Welcome to my house.”

Cora opened and closed her mouth as if to test the motions before she spoke.

“I … don’t know what to say? This is one hell of a surprise.”

She looked towards her dad, who didn’t say anything but had a smug grin on his face and looked proud of himself.

“I mean … wow. Who else is here?” Cora asked, referring to the voices from the next room.

“Oh, just … a bunch of people” Taylor grinned.

“Some of them you might know, some of them I will introduce you to” she added, eyes glistening in amusement.

“Oh man. So it’s Iike, a proper party” Cora stated and turned to her dad.

“Thanks dad, for the less-than-24-hour notice. If I had known this I would have gotten my nails done, my braids re-styled, my fa-“ she said dramatically but was interrupted by her dad’s and Taylor’s laughter.

“It’s alright, you look great. Your braids are awesome” Taylor reassured her.

“Um … thanks” Cora said, feeling shy. She had no idea how to react to her favorite singer complimenting her.

“Your dress is super cute too” Taylor added and reached out to touch the fabric on the younger girl’s shoulder.

Cora blushed and didn’t dare move. She didn’t have to glance at her dad to know he still had that damn grin on his face and that he was enjoying every second of his success of seeing his daughter so surprised and awkward. She made a mental note to thank him later.

“Taylor? Why are you guys still standing over there? The party is over here!” a female voice called out from the next room, causing the three of them to startle a little.

“Oh yeah, right, sorry” Taylor said quickly and gestured for them to come follow them.

“Everyone has just arrived within the last half hour, and we’re only waiting for two more people. We’re currently making snacks, and I lit the fireplace” she continued.

The room was indeed warm and cozy, and Cora looked around for a familiar face. Two girls around her age were sitting on the couch, and a tall blonde was walking out of the kitchen towards them. None of them were familiar. There were more voices coming from the kitchen.

“Hey, you must be Cora” the tall blonde said excitedly and shook Cora’s hand. Cora felt overwhelmed just by looking at her. Was everyone associated to Taylor Swift tall, blonde, and beautiful?

“I’m Karlie.” Cora uttered a shy “Nice to meet you”, but the confusion on her face must have been evident enough for Karlie to burst out laughing.

“I’m her girlfriend.”

“Whose?”

Behind her, she could hear her dad and Taylor chuckling.

_Is this some sort of extended practical joke?_

Karlie chuckled.

“Taylor’s.”

The wheels in Cora’s head started turning, but all she managed to get out was a small “oh”.

Taylor approached her and placed a hand on her shoulder from behind. “Don’t drop everything on the poor girl at once, Karlie. Let her come in and acclimate for a minute.”

Cora simply looked from one woman to the other, at a lack for words. Before she could find words, the two girls had come over from the couch and were introducing themselves to her as Kimby and Kariann, Karlie’s sisters. She uttered her “Nice to meet you”s again but her confusion only grew as to what kind of party this was exactly. She was positive that Taylor Swift had not simply invited her and her dad to an extended family dinner.

“Dad, how do you and Taylor know each other?”

The question had everyone around her erupt in giggles once more.

“Can someone please just tell me what’s going on?” She was practically begging at this point. The others were enjoying themselves at her expense way too much.

“He’s my mentor.” Taylor answered in her dad’s stead.

“Your mentor? For what?”

“Oh, ya know, conjuring skills.”

Cora felt her jaw hit the floor for the second time that day.

“You’re a _conjurer_?”

Taylor grinned. “Yep.” She drew out the ‘p’ sound.

“Oh.” She looked between her dad and Taylor, and then to the sisters. “And you guys …?” She made a vague hand gesture between them.

“We are” Kimby said, motioning between herself and Kariann. “Karlie’s not cause she’s not cool.”

“Oh wow.”

“Why don’t we talk about everything later and I introduce you to the rest of the people?” Taylor chimed in, seemingly eager to leave the current conversation. Cora didn’t blame her.

Taylor gently nudged Cora’s shoulder and motioned for her to follow her. They went into the kitchen. Here, Cora finally saw two familiar faces, and with the last revelation she had had, she was only a little bit surprised.

Beverly Yanez squeezed her in a tight hug. “I haven’t seen you in so long! How are you? How’s school?”

Cora laughed and hugged her back. “It’s good to see you too, Bev. I don’t know why we’re at Taylor Swift’s house or how you know her, but apparently I’m the last one to know everything today so I’m not questioning it.”

The others laughed.

She shook hands with a conjurer she knew was acquainted with her father as well. “Hello Patrick. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised to see you here. After all there are not that many people called Swift around.”

Taylor’s uncle laughed. “It’s been a while, Cora. You’ve grown up quite a bit. And well, I guess you never asked me if I’m related to the Taylor Swift.” He laughed and winked at her.

Then Cora’s eyes fell on the other two people in the room. It took her a second, but then she recognized them as Taylor’s parents. They introduced each other.

“Do you have conjuring skills too?” she asked after a while when they were making small-talk.

“No, Scott and I don’t have any skills. Only Taylor’s uncle and Taylor in our family right now” Andrea explained.

Cora simply hummed in response and nodded.

“Do you want to go back to the living room and hang out with people our age again?” Taylor whispered in her ear after a while.

Just then Mike entered the kitchen. Cora was sure the room had well exceeded its capacity by now anyways and eagerly took Taylor’s offer. The two young women joined Karlie and the twins on the couch.

Cora tried not to stare when she saw how close Taylor and Karlie were sitting and how comfortably Taylor’s leg was draped over Karlie’s lap and Karlie’s arm around Taylor. She caught Kariann’s look. The girl grinned at her. It dawned on Cora that she could hear her thoughts, and she quickly sheltered them. Her suspicion was confirmed when that caused Kariann to grin at her even wider and wink at her. Cora blushed.

They all made small-talk, trying to get to know Cora better. The others’ friendliness and their welcoming attitudes put Cora at ease. She nevertheless tried not to look at Taylor too much or else she would be star-struck and at a loss for words again.

“So, you’re from New York?” Kimby asked.

“Yep, born and raised. I’m a freshman in college but I still live with my parents and my little brother.”

She told them about her goal to be a journalist one day, how she had been a fan of Taylor’s since Fearless and how much she wanted a dog but her parents wouldn’t allow it. The twins told her about their internships and their plans for the next year and about their dog Joe who was in St Louis with their parents.

“Not gonna lie, a big part of why I want to go back and find work in St Louis is Joe” Kariann admitted.

“Aww” Taylor cooed.

“I’m thinking of getting my own dog, when I decide where I want to move” Kimby said.

The topics went onto other things. They talked about the movies they had seen this year, and then Taylor’s new album.

“Maybe now that I … now that I know you have a girlfriend, I’ll listen to it again from a different perspective” Cora said sheepishly and felt her ears become hot.

Taylor winked at her. “That’s the plan! Actually …” Her eyes went wide as if she had just had an idea.

“I’m having another party tomorrow. With fans. Do you wanna come?”

Cora couldn’t believe her ears. “What?”

“I invited some fans over here tomorrow to … ugh … talk about some stuff.” Taylor suddenly seemed nervous and fiddled with the hem of her shirt. Karlie ran her hand up and down her arm soothingly.

“I’d be happy if you’d be there as well. I’m sorry it’s so last minute, again.”

Taylor looked at Cora, who nodded. “Okay. Thank you.”

“I’ll talk to your dad later. I’m sure he will allow it.”

“My dad … I swear he’s been excited like a school girl all day. You guys really had one hell of a surprise there.” She laughed.

Taylor laughed too. “I’m glad I finally got to meet you, Cora. Your dad talks about you a lot.” She smiled.

Cora felt herself blush again. “So … what is he teaching you exactly?”

The twins groaned in response before Taylor could say anything.

“Everything! He has to teach her everything because she is so bad at managing her conjuring skills. Just this week she wanted to clean u-“

“Don’t listen to them!” Taylor interrupted. Karlie giggled.

“He’s been teaching me for the past three years or so. Nowadays it’s only once a month or less, but when we started, I had to learn so much. I had to learn how to manage my invisibility, mainly. Now we’re focusing on conjuring up items and other smaller skills. So yeah.”

Cora nodded in understanding.

Just as Taylor was about to ask the girl what her conjuring skills were, the doorbell rang. She reluctantly untangled herself from Karlie and got up. Before she could make her way across the room, however, they could hear Bev running to the door from the kitchen and squealing excitedly.

Taylor and Karlie burst out laughing.

“Ahh, the last two to arrive are here. Let’s bring out the snacks and wine!”

Everyone got up to meet the new guests and to get the party started.


	11. Eleven

 

The party was in full swing. Once Nevada and their partner had arrived, Taylor had brought out the wine and snacks. Everyone was talking and laughing loudly. Cora and the twins were occupying the living room and singing karaoke on the TV. Taylor had banned her own songs, so they had settled on 90s songs. Karlie watched them from time to time, laughing at their terrible performances.

“It’s been snowing for a while now” Mike said at one point and looked out of the window.

Snow was falling in heavy flakes, covering the lawn in the backyard. One could barely see until the beach.

“Yeah, it’s weird. It wasn’t in the forecast” Taylor said and nodded.

She startled when Mike spun around and looked across the room. “Beverly!”

Beverly came towards them with wide eyes. Taylor looked at her confused.

“I’m sorry Mike. It’s just that Taylor said she was disappointed there was no snow on her birthday, so I thought …”

Mike put his head in his hands. “You of all people should know the rules about this. Seriously?”

Taylor kept looking from one to the other with narrowed eyes as the conversation went on. It dawned on her that there was a silent conversation going on between them that she couldn’t listen to. Then, the penny dropped.

“Wait!”

Beverly looked at her with a grin on her face.

“You can conjure up _snow_?”

“Or rain. Or wind. Anything.” Beverly shrugged in playful nonchalance. “Happy birthday!”

“Oh my God.”

“Beverly, I’m serious!” Mike stood next to them, rubbing his temples. “It’s against the rules.”

“Oh come on, Mike. Live a little.” Beverly laughed and patted his shoulder.

“Taylor, are you thinking what I’m thinking?”

“No because I can’t hear thoughts.”

Beverly snort-laughed. “Telekinesis snowball fight!”

Before she knew what was happening, everyone was putting on their coats and beanies and running outside. Well, everyone except for Mike and Patrick, who remained behind, shaking their heads in amusement. Beverly knew that Mike couldn’t be mad at her for long. And if he was, she had enough stories up her sleeve from times when he bended the CA’s rules for his own entertainment.

The snow was about two inches by now. Taylor laughed as she watched the twins throw snowballs at each other simply by the force of their thoughts.

She felt a snowball hit the back of her jacket and turned around to face a grinning Karlie.

“This is the best thing ever!”

Taylor grinned back at her and shaped the snow in her hands into a small ball.

“Are you gonna use your skills?” Karlie asked expectantly. She was used to seeing these kinds of shenanigans from her sisters but had never seen Taylor do it. In fact, she wondered if they had ever been in a snowball fight together at all.

Taylor looked down at the snowball in her hands. “I don’t know if I can do it?”

Karlie wrapped her arms around her and kissed her cheek. “Yes, you can. You know how to work your skills.”

Just then another snowball hit Taylor’s arm.

“What’s up, nerds!” Kimby approached them with Kariann and Cora in tow.

Taylor giggled. Their hair was wet, their clothes covered in snow, and their cheeks were red.

“We saw you throwing snowballs with your hands like some kind of normal person” Kariann teased Taylor. “We’re challenging you to a fight with us. Conjurers only.” She laughed. “Sorry Karlie!”

Karlie stuck out her tongue at her sister. Cora simply stood there and watched the exchange. She still felt a little shy in Taylor’s presence, though the twins helped a great deal to break the ice. Taylor realized that she was probably ruining whatever image the girl had had in her mind of the singer until a few hours ago.

Without saying anything, she focused her eyes on the snowball in her hands. At first nothing happened, but after a little while it started hovering. Eventually it went up to her eye level and stayed there.

Karlie took in a sharp gasp. Taylor was unsure what to do next. Then she remembered how she moved any other object with her skills and realized this was no different. She imagined what she wanted to do and focused all her energy on it.

“Ouch!” Kimby yelped when the snowball hit her cheek.

The others nearly doubled over from laughing.

“It worked!” Karlie exclaimed and gave Taylor a high five. The singer was grinning widely.

“Just you wait!” Kimby rubbed her cheek but was laughing along with the others.

She picked up more snow, and soon a proper fight ensued between the five young women. Taylor and Karlie against Cora and the twins. Eventually, Beverly and Nevada joined the teams as well, and the sounds of laughter and snowball hitting jackets filled the backyard.

When they all got tired and had headaches from overusing their skills, they went inside to warm up. Andrea had prepared towels and a hot pot of tea for everyone.

Everyone sat down in the living room near the fire place, warming up and exchanging stories. Nevada was sitting next to Taylor. They hadn’t seen each other since Taylor’s invisibility incident three years prior, and while they had stayed in touch, they had a lot of catching up to do.

“So yeah, that’s when I texted _Code Black Cat_ to Bev because I had no idea what to do-“ Nevada was in the middle of recalling an incident when Taylor interrupted her.

“What?”

Nevada looked at Taylor with furrowed brows. “What do you mean? You use _Code Black Cat_ too, no?”

“Yes of course” Taylor said. She tilted her head. “I just didn’t know other people used it too?”

“What are you talking about? Every CA member uses it. Since like, forever.”

Taylor crossed her arms in front of her chest. “I didn’t … I thought I came up with it in junior high?” she asked with a quiet voice.

Nevada burst out laughing.  “Sorry Taylor, but no, you didn’t. It’s been around forever. You come up with a lot of cool things like lyrics and poems and songs, but that isn’t one of them.” They shook their head.

Cora chimed in. “You seriously don’t know where it comes from, Taylor?”

Taylor looked at the younger girl with wide eyes. “No? Was I supposed to know?”

“Yeah” Nevada, Cora and Mike said in unison. Taylor didn’t even question anymore that Cora and her dad hadn’t even been in earshot during her conversation with Nevada earlier. She made a mental note to shelter her thoughts better when around conjurers who could hear them.

Mike sat down opposite to Taylor and Nevada. “I can’t believe it’s never come up in our lessons. I guess I just thought you knew were it comes from since you use it, too.” He shifted and smiled at Taylor encouragingly.

“ _Code Black Cat_ is something that has originated in my family, and other families like mine. You see, back in the old days there used to be messenger families within the society of conjurers. These people possessed the skills of shape-shifting and used them to visit other people to deliver messages. They specifically used the shape of a black cat to convey news of an unforeseen event having happened. So that’s what Cora and my ancestors did before technology came around and overrode the practice.” He folded his hands in his lap.

“But the saying stuck so that’s why we still use it in front of non-conjurers. Pretty cool, huh?” Cora added, eyes glistening.

Taylor exhaled audibly. “Wow. I had no idea.” She scratched her head and laughed. “Now I feel stupid for having thought I invented it in junior high.”

Nevada patted her shoulder. “No, it’s okay. It’s kind of cute and funny.” They laughed again.

Taylor had a million questions for the father and daughter sitting opposite to her, but she pushed them to the back of her head. She would ask Mike next time she saw him, wanting him to enjoy the evening and not having to give her a history lesson.

The conversation went into a different direction and Taylor felt herself relax again. The snow outside had finally stopped falling.

“Hey babe” Karlie whispered into Taylor’s ear when she came over after a while. She squeezed Taylor’s shoulders from where she was standing behind the couch. The others looked towards her.

“I think your parents are preparing dinner in the kitchen” Karlie said. “I’m gonna go help them set the table, I’m starving.” She grinned.

Taylor almost jumped up. “Oh, right, yeah, I completely forgot about dinner!”

“I haven’t” Cora deadpanned and rubbed her stomach.

The others burst out laughing, and Taylor blushed. “Sorry guys. I didn’t mean to starve you.” She made a grimace.

“To be honest up until earlier I thought we’d have to host everyone for the night if the snow didn’t stop falling” Karlie laughed, “but now that it looks like it will be safe to drive again later, we should eat so it’s not getting too late.”

Taylor looked at her phone and saw that it was indeed getting late. She had completely lost track of time, enjoying every moment of their little get-together. She got up and nodded.

“Yeah, alright. Let’s help them. I’ll have everyone go to the dining room.”

“You set the table by hand? That’s so lame” Cora chimed in and rolled her eyes dramatically.

Mike looked at his daughter with wide eyes. Taylor laughed.

“We set the table and do everything else manually in our house, don’t listen to her!” He said hastily.

Cora grinned. “You don’t know what I use my skills for when I’m home alone.”

The others burst out laughing. “Oh my, why does this feel like a conversation I would have with the twins” Karlie laughed and shook her head.

“Enough! Let’s eat!” Mike said determinedly and walked towards the dining room.

Taylor and Karlie went into the kitchen to help with the last dinner preparations. Taylor grinned to herself all the while, thinking about how lucky she was to have made friends with the CA members she once found scary and intimidating.

The evening went by in a daze, and before she knew it her big day was there.


	12. Twelve

 

„Take a deep breath babe, it’s gonna be okay” Karlie whispered and squeezed Taylor’s hand. She placed a light kiss on her cheek.

Taylor inhaled and exhaled. She looked at Karlie. “I know. I’m just nervous.”

“You’ll do great!” Selena came over and gave Taylor a hug.

“I know.” Taylor bit her lip.

“I’m gonna go downstairs now to meet everyone.”

Taylor, Karlie and Selena were upstairs in Taylor’s Rhode Island home. Downstairs, her living room was full of excited fans. She was about to meet them, play songs for them and come out. Right now, however, she preferred hiding under a blanket and never talking to anyone ever again. Except maybe for Karlie.

She sighed. She had planned on doing this, and she was going to do it. It was what she wanted. It was what she had wanted to do for years. Now was the time. She had never felt this nervous in her whole life. No amount of sold-out stadiums had prepared her for this moment.

Karlie hugged her tightly and placed another kiss on her cheek, careful not to ruin the singer’s make-up.

“You’ll do great. I believe in you. I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

Selena watched them, doing her best not to tear up. She cleared her throat.

“So, Karlie and I will go downstairs first through the kitchen and join everyone in the living room. I hope your fans will recognize me, Taylor” she said drily.

Taylor laughed. “Shut up.”

“Your mum texted me that everyone is having snacks and talking and they’re all ready for you to come out, both literally and figuratively” Karlie looked at her phone and grinned.

“Shut up” Taylor reiterated and rolled her eyes. She was too nervous to show it, but she appreciated the way her friend and girlfriend tried to calm her nerves.

“Okay, we’ll go downstairs now, see you in five” Selena announced and started walking towards the door, Karlie following her.

Taylor stayed back and took a deep breath. She could hear people cheering downstairs, letting her know that Selena had joined them. She wondered how many of her fans would recognize Karlie. They had always done their best to keep a low profile, but over the years the one or other paparazzi photo had gotten released, or fans had mentioned seeing Karlie with Taylor.

Her phone lit up with a text from her mum. _Ready? You can come down anytime now_. She took another deep breath. So many people she knew were downstairs, and then so many people she had never met before. She had selected her fans very carefully – ones she knew would be supportive, or ones she knew were part of the LGBT community.

She took a last look into the mirror. Then, she walked out of the room with a determined swing in her step. Walking down the stairs she realized that tonight would not only make a huge impact in her own life, but that of her LGBT fans as well. It gave her the last push of confidence she needed before she walked into the living room.

The first thing she heard was the room erupting in cheers and claps. The first thing she saw was Karlie sitting on the couch, looking at her with a wide grin on her face. She hadn’t meant to look at her, but it made her feel warm and encouraged. Then her gaze wandered over the people sitting on the couches and on pillows on the floor. She recognized every single face despite not having met most of them yet.

She smiled and waved. “Hey guys, I’m Taylor. Thank you for coming over!”

Andrea walked back in as well and gave Taylor a hug. Taylor sat down and waited for everyone to calm down. Out of the corner of her eyes she saw Tree, Austin and her dad walking out of the kitchen and sitting down at the other end of the room.

She started talking, and after a while the ice was broken and the fans started responding, talking back and forth with each other and Taylor. They talked about her new album, her upcoming tour and everyone’s favorite songs. Even the twins joined in, and Taylor appreciated it.

Sitting next to the twins was Cora. Taylor felt grateful that she was getting along so well with the twins and wasn’t shy around her anymore. And she was one more person in the room who knew what Taylor was going to talk about.

But for now, Taylor focused on getting to know everyone in the room and make them feel at home. She went around the room to introduce herself to every fan individually and to take the time to talk to them.

“Who wants more snacks?” Andrea announced after a while when she came out of the kitchen with a fresh tray of pizza rolls. Taylor laughed when she saw Cara and Jourdan racing towards the table. She was grateful to have Karlie’s friends there as well.

When she looked across the room, she saw Karlie and Derek standing in the corner talking to each other. Karlie caught her gaze and smiled at her. Taylor smiled back.

She had just finished talking to a girl with pink and purple hair and went towards the next person. Her eyes lit up when she saw who it was.

“Taylor, I’m so happy to meet you finally” the girl with countless freckles on her face exclaimed and hugged her.

Taylor laughed and hugged back. “Hey Kelley!”

“How do you know everyone’s names? Oh God” Kelley asked with wide eyes.

“You went to college with Kimby and Kariann, right?” Taylor asked back instead of answering.

Kelley nodded. “Yeah, they were my teammates’ roommates. We became friends when we listened to your music on move-in day.”

“I know” Taylor said and grinned.

“How?” Kelley threw her head back in frustration. “This is just like in college. I knew that Kimby and Kariann’s sister knows you and therefore they probably also know you, but they never told me more and let me tell you I’ve been thinking about this every day for the past 4 years” she said dramatically.

Taylor giggled. “It will all make sense later.”

Kelley gave her a strange look but didn’t ask further. Taylor wondered how much the girl really knew. They kept talking about Kelley’s career in professional soccer, and then Taylor moved on to the next person.

Meanwhile, Kimby, Kariann and Cora were watching the exchange.

“Dammit, I wish we were in earshot so we could hear Kelley and Taylor talk. This is the moment I’ve been waiting for since like day one of college” Kimby sighed.

“I know. It’s way too loud in here to hear thoughts” Kariann said and Cora nodded.

“Besides, Taylor really learned how to shelter her thoughts well and constantly, I’m impressed.” She took a sip of her soda. “Where did she learn that?”

“I don’t know, online tutorials?” Kimby deadpanned. Cora giggled.

“Shut up Kimby, that stupid joke is so old.” Kariann rolled her eyes. “Karlie probably taught her.”

“Or my dad.”

Kariann laughed. “Oh yeah. Right. I always forget she’s like, an active member of the CA now.”

“In my heart, she will always be the clumsy, oblivious conjurer she used to be.” Kimby put her hand over her heart and sighed dramatically. The other two burst out laughing.

Karlie looked over to them and smiled. Then her gaze wandered across the room towards Taylor, who was still talking to fans. She was standing near the snack table, talking to Andrea and Austin. They were mainly occupied with making sure everyone had enough to eat and drink – Karlie felt the nervousness radiating off of them about what was yet to come.

Selena was busy talking to fans as well. After a while, she noticed that the room had quieted down a little. She looked up and saw Taylor re-entering the room. Her friend made her way across the room and sat down at her piano. Everyone shifted to see her better.

“Oh my God, is she gonna play” she heard a fan next to her whisper to another one.

Taylor looked up and caught Selena’s eyes, and she gave her an encouraging grin. Even from across the room she could tell Taylor was nervous.

“So, you’re probably all curious why I invited you all over to my house tonight” Taylor started and cleared her throat.

“Well, first of all I wanted to thank you in person for liking my new album. And it was also my birthday this week-“ The room erupted in cheers.

Taylor grinned. “Thank you.” She let her eyes wander across the room. She saw Karlie standing next to her mother.

“I thought I could play some songs for you now.” The fans cheered again.

She saw Karlie clapping too, grinning widely all the while. She realized that while she had played the songs for Karlie before, she had never done so in front of people. She was planning a tour, but this was different. More intimate. More immediate. She pushed the thoughts of what she was going to talk about later aside and hit the first key.

 

“This is called _New Year’s Day_.”

 

***

 

“You may have wondered why this little get-together is called the Secret Session” Taylor said and looked around the room. Around thirty pairs of eyes were glued to her, following her every movement. She could see the expectation in every single one of them.

“Yeah” someone mumbled, and everyone nodded.

Taylor smiled. “I only played songs you already know, so that’s not very secret.” She pushed a strand of hair out of her face. “Though I loved how all of you sang along, thank you for doing that.”

Karlie watched her girlfriend intently from across the room. She wondered if she should have sat next to Taylor. Though that would have surely given them away. She bit her lip and took a sip of her water.

Selena stood next to her and squeezed her shoulder in reassurance. Karlie gave her a nervous smile.

“What I’m going to tell you now is a secret I’ve kept for a long time.”

Someone took in a sharp breath. Karlie could feel her heart beating faster with every word that Taylor spoke.

“As you all know, I started in the country music scene and signed my first contract when I was only a teenager.” Taylor looked at her hands in her lap. “I always dreamed of becoming successful. And when you want to be successful, you have to make sacrifices. Or so I thought.” She took a deep breath.

Karlie felt her lip shivering. All she wanted to do was run over to Taylor and wrap her in a hug and place a million kisses on her forehead.

“You see, as you get older and you look back on what you have achieved in your life, you start focusing on the things that really matter. I don’t have to tell you how many tours I sold out, or how many Grammys I won – you all know that. All of you are here because I was and still am successful, and in return I am successful because of people like you.” Taylor looked up and looked around the room.

“And you are also here because I am going to tell you about a secret I had to keep in order to become successful. This is going to be between me and you, for now at least. Soon it will not be a secret anymore.” She bit her lip.

The fans in the room looked at her with wide eyes. Taylor’s friends and family held their breaths.

“Over the years, the media has painted me as a man-eater. I want every single one of you to know that it does not matter how many people you date. But that is not my point. My point is that I never dated any of these men.”

Someone gasped in surprise. Karlie looked around the room and saw Kelley biting her lip nervously.

“I’ve only been in three relationships since I started being in the public eye. And all of them are women. I’m not straight.”

What followed was a collective, audible gasp and murmuring. “We love you!” someone spoke over the noise of the room, their voice steady but gentle.

It was followed by similar affirmations. Taylor relaxed visibly and smiled. She looked at every single person in the room with tears in her eyes.

“Can I ask a question?” a girl asked shyly. Taylor nodded. The room went quiet again.

“But what about the men you dated in public? I understand how PR works, but what was their motive to do it?”

Taylor leaned forward a little. “I can’t give you any details about that, I’m sorry. I’m happy to answer more questions, though. But please understand if I can’t say anything where other people are involved.”

“I understand.”

The fans started asking more questions, some of which Taylor gave answers to. Kariann and Kimby were sitting with Cora and Kelley and talking to other fans as well. They felt no need to reveal themselves as people close to Taylor – they had agreed to not introduce Karlie as her girlfriend, after all.

“Do you think she has a girlfriend?” – “Do you think she’s gay or bi?” – “Why does it matter?” – “I always thought her public relationships were a bit strange.” – “I’m so happy she did this. She’s going to have such a huge impact once she comes out publicly.” – “I’m so happy for her.” – “I really want to know if she has a girlfriend and why she chose now as a time to come out.” – “When I go home the first thing I’ll do is listen to all of her music again with this new perspective.” – “I understand Reputation a lot better now.”

Karlie stood there, bits and pieces of the chatter in the room coming to her ears. She was watching Taylor answer questions and talking to fans. It warmed her heart to see fans giving her hugs and telling her how proud they were of her. And yet she felt her chest grow heavy. She hadn’t wanted to be introduced as Taylor’s girlfriend, yet now all she wanted to do was stand on the highest surface in the room and shout how much she loved her.

She kept talking quietly to Selena. Taylor’s friend had tears in her eyes. She had discreetly recorded everything with her phone. “Mostly for Abigail because she can’t be here today. But also for me to cry about again later.”

After a while, Karlie caught Taylor’s eyes. She smiled at her, but Taylor didn’t smile back. Karlie stopped short and gave her a questioning look. Taylor simply raised an eyebrow in response. Karlie understood nevertheless.

“I think Taylor is done” she quietly said to Selena and made her way across the room towards the singer.

All eyes were on them as Karlie approached Taylor and put a hand on the small of her back. Taylor exhaled audibly and relaxed at Karlie’s touch. She didn’t take her hand. She simply started walking towards the door that led to the hallway.

“Thank you everyone, I’ll be right back.”

Curious stares followed them until they were out of sight. Once at the bottom of the stairs, Taylor took Karlie’s hand and they silently walked upstairs.

“You did so well, I’m so proud of you” Karlie said once the door was closed and Taylor collapsed into her arms. She rubbed her back soothingly.

Taylor didn’t cry but she was breathing heavily.

“Breathe, baby. Do your breathing exercise” Karlie instructed while rubbing circles on her back, doing her best to ease Taylor’s anxiety.

After a while Taylor calmed down and spoke up. “That went well, right?”

Karlie kissed her temple. “Yes, it did. Everyone was being supportive.”

“Yeah.” Taylor sighed.

“I was so nervous. I thought about a way to back out. But I’m so happy I did it. This is only the beginning.”

“You did so well.”

“I’m so anxious though, about someone leaking information. I know everyone signed an NDA but still …”

Karlie kept rubbing circles on her back. “They won’t. Your fans love you so much, and so many of them know exactly how you feel.”

“I know.” Taylor sighed again.

They stood like this for a while until it was time for Taylor to go downstairs to say her goodbyes to the fans.

Karlie remained behind and gave Taylor a kiss on the cheek.

“It’s going to be okay.”


	13. Thirteen

_The car was driving along the road near the coast. There was not much traffic, and the view was clear. The sun had already passed its zenith, despite it only being the early afternoon. The two women in the car were enjoying the scenery. The endlessness of the Pacific Ocean, the rock formations and the wildflowers on the side of the road. They had turned the windows down to allow a fresh breeze in._

Karlie rolled over towards Taylor’s side of the bed, accidentally kicking her in the back. Taylor let out a groan, but neither of them woke up.

_“You said you’d play me your new album” Karlie said, watching Taylor from the passenger’s seat._

_Taylor sighed. “I know, babe. I will. I’m kinda nervous, though. Give me a minute.”_

Karlie lay there without a blanket, having tossed it to the side during the night. Shivering, she instinctively moved closer towards Taylor and pressed her torso against her back.

_She looked back on the road. They had approached a car in front of them that was going way under the speed limit, so she overtook it. The car became smaller in the rearview mirror. Taylor checked her speed. No, she was good. She gripped the steering wheel, palms sweaty. The road in front was all clear. The scenery passed by, but by now her mind was occupied otherwise._

Karlie lay still. The room was quiet, the city asleep around them. Only the occasional headlight shined through the blinds, illuminating the room.

_Karlie reached out her hand, and Taylor took it and squeezed it. The road ahead of them was clear, no need to worry. Taylor nevertheless slowed down the speed._

_After scrolling through her phone for a while, Taylor cleared her throat, her finger hovering over the play button._

_“This one’s called ‘Dancing with our hands tied’.”_

Karlie became restless again, separating herself from Taylor. As she turned around, she accidentally shoved her knee into Taylor’s back. The singer groaned and woke up from the pain. Nevertheless, she was too tired to open her eyes, so she barely acknowledged the situation.

_Karlie closed her eyes as she listened to the song. It was perfect. It summed up everything they had been going through in a way only Taylor could put into words._

_She opened her eyes again and took in a sharp breath. She was looking into the rearview mirror and saw two black cars approaching with high speed. She looked over to Taylor, whose eyes were focused on the road and mind was focused on the song._

_“Taylor …” Her voice was shaking._

Karlie tossed and turned without waking up. Taylor closed her eyes and fell back asleep immediately.

_Taylor turned towards Karlie, then looked into the rearview mirror. Her mouth formed an ‘o’, but no sound came out. The cars were approaching fast, taking up both lanes of the road._

_“What do we do?” Taylor said in a high-pitched voice._

_Karlie was breathing heavily, her eyes wide open. “I don’t know! Pull over!”_

_Taylor did as she was told. The tires screeched when they came to a halt on the gravel next to the paved road. The two women looked at each other. The song was still playing from the speakers._

Karlie rolled over in bed once again, kicking her legs into the air and onto the mattress. Her sheets were a tangled mess at the bottom of the bed. Taylor woke up again, this time opening her eyes completely.

_They watched in horror as the cars came even closer. They were less than 70 feet away. It was all happening fast. The cars made no move to drive around their own car. In fact, it looked like they were directing towards them._

_Karlie gasped when she saw the top windows on the cars slide open and two men in suits and sunglasses lean out. They were each holding huge cameras. A blinding wave of flashlights followed. Taylor and Karlie held their hands in front of their faces._

Taylor rolled to her other side, holding her pillow. She gasped when she saw Karlie next to her, tossing and turning and kicking. She reached out her arm, trying to wake her up.

_The clicking of the cameras approached as fast as the cars._

_“Taylor Swift!” The men were shouting. “Taylor Swift! Taylor Swift!”_

_It was the last thing Karlie heard before she felt an impact and everything turned to nothing._

 

***

 

Taylor was sitting at the kitchen island, eating leftovers from the night before and drinking coffee. She was scrolling through her phone, texting her friends and family a Happy New Year.

When she heard the shuffling of feet approaching, she looked up. She frowned.

“Babe, how are you doing? How did you sleep?”

Karlie simply mumbled something and went directly to the fridge. Taylor got up. When Karlie turned towards her again, she wrapped her in a big hug.

“Good morning, babe. Happy new year.”

Karlie hugged her back tightly.

“You had a nightmare last night, huh? I tried to wake you up, but I couldn’t. You were kicking. When I touched your shoulder you screamed, but then you lay still for the rest of the night.” Taylor spoke while rubbing circles on Karlie’s back. She kissed her temple.

“Do you want to tell me about it?”

Karlie gulped. She hugged Taylor just a little bit tighter. “Yeah. Later. Not right now.”

“Okay” Taylor whispered and let her go.

Karlie prepared herself breakfast and poured coffee, then sat down next to Taylor.

“God, this place is a mess” she giggled and bit into her sandwich.

Taylor looked around the kitchen. There were empty bottles and dirty dishes all over the counter and in the middle of the kitchen island.

“Yeah” she smiled. “We need to clean up later.” She took a sip from her coffee. “Or I’ll test my skills.”

Karlie groaned in response. “No, please. You’re never using your skills to clean something ever again.”

Taylor laughed, and Karlie stuck out her tongue.

Taylor was glad to be able to put a smile on her girlfriend’s face. She was curious to learn what her nightmare had been about, but she felt bad for Karlie at the same time. They had gone to bed late after their party, and now it was still before noon. There were dark circles under Karlie’s eyes.

They finished their breakfast, then started cleaning up. Taylor put the radio on. A Tracy Chapman song was playing, and she hummed along.

“When we’re done here, we can also do something about those boxes in the guest bedroom that you haven’t unpacked yet while we’re at it” Taylor said after a while.

Karlie sighed. “I know. I’m sorry. I promise I will get to it this year.” She chuckled.

“Hilarious, never heard a joke like this before” Taylor said and rolled her eyes.

Karlie put down the plate she had been drying and walked towards Taylor. She wrapped her in another hug. Taylor was taken aback but didn’t say anything.

“I’m so excited to live with you” Karlie murmured into her ear.

“I am, too.” Taylor kissed her temple. Karlie had started bringing some of her belongings into Taylor’s apartment after Christmas.

Karlie traced Taylor’s jawline with her fingertips, causing her to look at her. Their eyes met, and they smiled at each other. Karlie closed the distance between them. The kiss was soft, yet passionate. Taylor’s hands were firmly gripping Karlie’s waist, keeping her close.

When they separated, Karlie felt her eyelids become heavy again.

“You’re still tired, babe” Taylor said softly and ran her thumb over her cheek.

“Why don’t we take a nap on the couch together with the cats? We can clean up the rest later. And when we wake up you can tell me about your nightmare.” She took both of Karlie’s hands into her own.

Karlie nodded, stifling a yawn.

“I’d love to.”

 

**THE END**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and the kudos and comments! I hope you enjoyed this series! <3
> 
>  
> 
> This story is a work of fiction. The words, thoughts and actions of characters based on real-life people in this story are purely fictional and are not meant to imply any real-life resemblance. The other characters are original characters, any resemblance towards real-life people is purely coincidental and unintentional. Places, businesses, incidents and events are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner.
> 
> Characters based on real persons:  
> Taylor Swift, Andrea Swift, Scott Swift, Austin Swift, Karlie Kloss, Kimby Kloss, Kariann Kloss, Cara Delevingne, Derek Blasberg, Jourdan Dunn, Selena Gomez, Tree Paine, Beverly Yanez, Kelley O’Hara, Alysha Clark


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